• May Schedule!

    May 1, 2023 /
    Events all in eastern time:
    • Weds May 10th @ 6 pm:  Self Portraiture for Ecosexual Embodiment – virtual event co-facilitated with Lior Allay, part 4 of 4! This class has been AMAZING so far, I can’t believe we’re on the last one already! We’ll be discussing GENDER + SEXUALITY through self portraiture
    • Thurs May 11th @ 12 pm: Tattoo appointment with Alex Santaloci at Iron Ghost Tattoo (will either be my last or my second to last tattoo appointment for my half body Poplar tree tattoo!!!!)
    • Sat May 13th @ 10 am: Photo Bloom: Self Portrait Workshop – in person in Mooresville, NC – I’m teaching the self portrait workshop and we’ll have 4 custom created sets for attendees to take self portraits in!
    • Tues May 16th @ 7 pm: Queen City Kinky Photography Meetup – in person in Charlotte, NC – hang out and talk photography
    • Thurs May 18th @ 6 pm: LIMINAL Opening Reception – 5 of my double exposure photographs are in this exhibition, including a self portrait!
    • Mon May 22nd @ 6 pm: Queen City Kinky Photography Model/Photographer Etiquette Workshop – in person in Charlotte, NC – learn how to have safe(r) and successful photoshoots from either side of the lens – this is a prerequisite to our future group shoot events
    • Weds May 24th @ 7 pm: Self Portrait Showcase – virtual event co-facilitated with Lior Allay – submit your self portraits to share, all experience levels welcome!
    • May 26th – 29th: IGNITE BURN – I will be teaching a self portrait class one of the days of the burn!
    Click the name of the event for all the info!
    Patrons: see THIS POST for 40% off the self portrait course!
    read more
    Comments Off on May Schedule!

  • 2022 Recap!

    January 9, 2023 /

    I did a 2021 recap last year and was really encouraged by it, so I’m doing another one this year! I have issues with object permanence and it’s easy for me to feel like I’ve done NOTHING, so looking back and writing up the major things that happened and the things that I accomplished is really helpful for me to realize that I did, in fact, DO THINGS!

    I created this to help myself realize that I am accomplishing things all the time even though I feel like I haven’t. I did NOT create this to make you feel like you need to compete with me or for you to compare yourself to me. The last thing I want is to make someone else feel bad about themself. Everyone’s life and journey is different, and we are ALL VALID whether or not we accomplished ANYTHING AT ALL. ♥

    This post contains affiliate links. This means I may earn a commission should you choose to make a purchase using my link (at no extra cost to you!). I only recommend things I have personally used + love!

    • Journaled every day (I started this Jan 20th 2020 – almost on year 3!)
    • Energy practices (almost) every day
    • Took many walks outside + at parks
    • Spent time w friends
    • 8 tattoo appointments – so much closer to being done with this massive project!
    • Went to Floyd Yoga Jam
    • Visited a friend in Boone
    • Got covid in August for the first (and hopefully only) time
    • Visited AD in DC x2
    • Solo van camping trip to Shenandoah
    • Solo van camping in Hocking Hills
    • Got STI tested in Feb, May, + Dec
    • Went to an Art Walk in my hometown
    • Went to friends + familys bday parties
    • Went to a family reunion in VA for my dad’s side of the family
    • Got a new passport with my name change and X gender marker!
    • Volunteered at the VAPA Center
    • Dyed my pubic hair blue x2
    • Spent over $2500 on van repairs (oil changes, inspection, window motor, fuel line, tires…)
    • Mountain trip with Abe at airbnb +  mushroom experience
    • 3x mushroom trips + microdosed several times
    • Helped set up and break down Sol Harmony Fest, my first time seeing behind the scenes of how a festival comes to life!
    • Housesit for my aunt while she’s out of town x2
    • Asheville trip w Abe (surprise trip that last minute changed but was still super fun)
    • Mountainpalooza with 15 of my high school friends! (year 4 and counting!)
    • Stayed w Granny for a week to help her out after she was in the hospital w pneumonia
    • Hosted a model + her partner, first time hosting in several years – since 2017/18?
    • Van camped w friends 5 different times
    • First group van camping experience! 13 people and 4 dogs in a mountain forest
    • Went to 2 bonfires with friends
    • Abe and I made a Duct Tape Dummy of myself

    Let me know what you’d like to see from me in 2023 by responding to my survey!

    • AD tied + suspended me for the first time in years, my first suspension since my rope injury in 2016, first time at The Crucible
    • Got back into the local kink scene + started going to play parties
    • Got myself a doggie crate for my bedroom, for claustrophilia reasons, also for putting myself in time out reasons, and kink reasons lol
    • Did my first self suspension in rope
    • Went to PUSH – a fetish party in Durham
    • Went to 4 kink parties
    • Went to 5 rope labs
    • Had 3 rope mentoring sessions (so far)

    I was only able to accomplish these things because of the support from members of my patreon, thank you so much!

    • Anti-planning Workshop w Elizabeth Goddard
    • Yoni Massage Workshop w Lior Allay
    • Nude Yoga (virtual) w Lior Allay
    • Feelings 101 w Dawn Serra
    • Advanced Master Program on the Treatment of Trauma from NICABM (5 part master class)
    • How to Build Your Business Without Social Media w Becca Tracey
    • Thai Massage Workshop w Ann Marie
    • Balls + Yoga w Ann Marie
    • Glow Yoga w Meridith Young
    • Laughter Yoga w Carolyn Keller Sells
    • Plant ID Walk – Know Your Weeds w I-TAL Acres
    • Psychedelic Breathwork w Monica McGee + Kendall Selfe
    • Ecstatic Dance w Katie Wells + Beatfarm3r
    • Howdy! Partner Yoga w Shawn + Marie Nuthall
    • Energy Medicine Yoga w Nicole Lafon
    • Nature Walk – Plants, Food, + Fire w Johnny Stowe
    • Defying Gravity: Acroyoga FUNdamentals w Kaelyn Rogers
    • Intuitive Movement w Claire Nagy-Kato
    • Teas Tonics + Tinctures w Willow Luna (my mom!)
    • Psychedelic Integration w Anjali Valea
    • Chakti Yoga w Lauren Nixon
    • Rhythm + Flow Yoga w Amber + Jimi Nedoff
    • Learned a suspendable futomomo and uplines (thanks AD)
    • Found a local rope mentor + started recurring meetings to learn rope bondage
    • Aftercare is a “bad word” w Zir Oya aka @mount.saintoya via Shibari Study
    • Rope Has an Image Problem w Christian Red via Shibari Study

    Check out the organized list of HUNDREDS of books I want to read!

    show your support for free:
    show your support financially (sliding scale!):
    read more
    Comments Off on 2022 Recap!

  • Why Diverse Nude Art Is Important

    August 20, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends! I’m here this week to talk about why I think it’s important for us to be able to see more diverse people naked.

    Obviously, I am of the group of people that has some of the most privileges in this world. I’m white, able-bodied, thin, “conventionally attractive”, whatever the fuck that means. So it’s easier for people who look like me to be naked and be accepted for their nudity, but for people that have more intersections than I do, people that are Black, Brown, Indigenous, people of color in general, people with disabilities… are less visible in art because of many reasons, racism, sexism, like all of the things.

    If more people made art of people that look different than me: people with bigger bodies, people with darker bodies, people with visible disabilities, if more art was made of people like them, then I believe that people would be more accepting and understanding of a wide range of human experiences. And I also believe that if more people of intersecting experiences are able to see art of people that look like them, then it’s probably going to be easier for them to feel like they are accepted and like they are important and like they are art.

    I believe that all bodies are good bodies and that all bodies are model bodies, and I really would love to see more art of people that look different from me. I think it’s very important. I believe that the more diverse models that can be seen by society, the better off society will be. Obviously, like diversity equity and inclusion is kind of the thing right now, for a bunch of reasons. But it’s true. We need diversity. We need equity and inclusion. We need people to make art that is of a variety of different humans, and not just people that look like me.

    Because if it’s just of people that look like me, then all of these, racism, sexism, fatphobia, ableism. Those things are going to continue to run rampant because it’s just going to be compounded on itself.

    We need people to make art and share art and see art that includes people that look different from me. I am like “the norm” in art and I’m fucking tired of it, it is boring. I want to see more diverse people in art, and the more diverse art can be, the more incredible the art community will be, the more stories we’ll hear and the more we’ll learn, and the more we’ll understand other people’s experiences. I think art is kind of a universal language. And if we can see art that includes a variety of different people, then we’ll all be better off for it.

    Please make art if you are anybody that looks different from me! Please make art! Please make nude art! Please make self-portraits! Please make something that is different from me! I’m tired of seeing people that look like me in art! I want to see something else! Obviously, people that look like me in art are still good things, but I’m tired of it being the only art that is accepted and the only art that is seen as important, because that is not true. Art is for everybody. 

    If you would like to make art with me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum, we are hosting a workshop in Ypsilanti Michigan on August 27 + 28 called Conscious Creativity. We’ll be creating self-portraits and also creating self-portraits in a group. Come and join us! If you can’t afford it, fill out our application for a scholarship. We would like to have you come! All the information is on the Eventbrite, I’m going to link it below.

    Art is important and the more diverse it can be, the better off humanity will be! Thank you.

    I want to be a part of Conscious Creativity! I want to learn more!

    show your support for free:
    show your support financially (sliding scale!):

    read more
    Comments Off on Why Diverse Nude Art Is Important

  • Why Nude Art Is Important To Me

    August 13, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends! Today I am talking about why nudity, specifically, is important to me in art and why I think it’s important to have nude art and participate in nude art and make nude art. 

    So, obviously there’s a bunch of kinds of art and I know that social media has kind of suppressed nudity and nude art specifically for probably a lot of reasons that I don’t agree with, but I believe that nude art is extremely important partially because it is literally the oldest form of art. The oldest art that has been discovered is of a nude body, it’s a statue and… you should check it out, go on the internet and search for oldest art. Since the beginning of art, since humans have been making art, they have been making art of nude bodies.

    I think that it’s important to show that nudity is not inherently sexual. That nudity can be for any variety of reasons. I mean sexuality can be part of that, but if that’s not an inherent part of nudity. Having nude art, to me, shows that our bodies are good. These are good bodies, no matter what your body looks like, no matter what shape size color ability. All bodies are good bodies. To me all bodies are model bodies. And if you’re able to be nude and create art and share that, then people that look like you can see that they are art too. 

    Our culture really tries to make us feel like we have to buy things and do a bunch of things in order to make our bodies better and in order to make our bodies “good”. They just want to sell us shit. They want us to have low self-esteem and buy all their things so that we can try to be better people, but being a good person has nothing to do with external visual things. Being a good person is what’s on the inside. 

    I feel like when I’m naked, I can more easily share what’s inside of me, on the outside. I don’t have anything to hide. I’m not covering my Self. I’m fully me and I feel like I can be more fully present when I’m nude. I feel like when I’m nude, I can feel into my body more, in a sensual way, and if I have clothes on it numbs that. Because my body is like, “oh it’s clothes. I’m just going to ignore the feeling of clothes because they’re there and it’s going to be a long time that they’re on.” So my body stops sensing as much. But when I’m nude, I feel like I can feel the breeze on my skin. My own touch. I can feel the sun, the warmth of the sun on my skin. I can feel if “oh, hey there’s an ant crawling up my leg”. I just feel like I’m more able to be in my body and feel in my body when I’m nude and to me, that’s a part of art, is if I can be fully myself and create art in that way, it’s that much more powerful than if I was pretending to be something else.

    Yeah, I think nude art is really important. I think the more people that can see nude art and understand or experience that nudity is not inherently sexual, then maybe we’ll have less traumatic experiences. Maybe we’ll have less shame. Maybe we’ll be less self conscious. To me nude art is really important, and the more of us that can make it and share it and look at it, the better. 

    If you would like to make a nude art with me, me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum are hosting a workshop in Ypsilanti, Michigan, on August 27th and 28th in person, and we’ll be creating self-portraits individually and as a group, so if you would like to be a part of that, I have all the information below in the Eventbrite. If there’s anything that you’re curious about that is not answered by the Eventbrite, please let me know. I’d be happy to answer your questions. 

    Yeah, please join us! We would love to have you there. I’m so excited to make art with you! Yay, and we can be naked and outside! And yeah, we’re going to be on a farm, it’s like a permaculture farm / sanctuary, and they are fully cool with us being totally naked. We have permission to be naked in this space. So if you would like to join, the information is below. I hope to see you there. Bye!

    This sounds wonderful! I want to be a part of Conscious Creativity!

    show your support for free:
    show your support financially (sliding scale!):

    read more
    Comments Off on Why Nude Art Is Important To Me

  • Why I Don’t Model Much Anymore

    July 23, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window (now with embedded captions!)

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi, friends! Today I am excited to talk about why I don’t really model much anymore. 

    I have not officially retired, but I am super extra incredibly picky about who I will pose for and honestly, it’s not very many people. So I don’t really model much anymore for a few reasons, but some of them are… I feel like I have kind of… 

    Posing for other people has kind of run its course for me. I used to super enjoy it, it was a really fun adventure. I really liked meeting new people and helping them create art in whatever way that they were excited to create and posing for them. But now, it doesn’t feel as exciting for me anymore to make art for other people. I’m much more interested in making art for myself, which is why I prefer self-portraiture. 

    Another reason is, I’ve had my gender realization and I’m agender. I’m like, I’m a trans person. I’m non-binary, agender. I’m not a woman, and I feel like most photographers that want to hire me see me as a woman and are not really capable or willing to see the full spectrum of who I am. And kind of want to push a feminine idea and feminine imagery on me, which I’m no longer willing to participate in. It was okay before, I was never really comfortable with it, and then, when I had my gender understanding it became a lot more clear that, yeah, I’m just really not willing to feminize myself for other people’s art.

    So that’s probably one of the main reasons why I basically only model for women and trans people now because I feel like they see me more as who I am instead of who they want me to be. It’s not that there are men who can’t like… there are men who can see me as me, but I feel like the majority of them are just kind of guys with cameras who just want to take photos of a naked woman and that’s not me. I am naked but I’m not a woman. Posing for other people is not as exciting and fun for me as it used to be. And that’s the primary reason why I don’t really model much anymore. I’d rather take self portraits. 

    If you would like an opportunity to take self-portraits with me, we… me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum are hosting Conscious Creativity in Ypsilanti Michigan, in person on a permaculture farm. I’m so excited, August 27th and 28th. It’s a two-day workshop. I have a lot of information about it in other vlogs and on the Eventbrite that I’ll link below. But if you are curious about self portraiture, and if you would like to take self portraits and have all of my tips and tricks for those, and also the opportunity to take self portraits in a group with me and Lior and Roarie, join us! Buy a ticket, come to Ypsilanti and pose with us, take self portraits with us! I’m very excited. I’ll put all the information below, but I don’t want to ramble on about Conscious Creativity because I have more information about that in other places, but if you’d like to join us, I’ll link it below.

    More info about Conscious Creativity

    I hope you enjoyed this video. And if you’re a cis male photographer who would like to hire me as a model, I hope this helps you understand why I probably said no. Not that I have anything against cis males, like cis men, but I just feel like women and trans people can see me as who I am. And yeah, it just feels more fulfilling to create art with people who can understand me, than people who want to like, push something onto me. I love you so much and I will talk to you soon! Bye!

    Join me, Lior, and Roarie for Conscious Creativity on August 27 + 28! All the details are here 💖

    read more

  • How Self Portraiture Connects Me to Myself

    July 16, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window (now with embedded captions!!!)

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! Welcome to another week of me making a vlog. Today I want to talk about how self-portraiture connects me to myself.

    I first started taking self-portraits in…. I actually don’t know what year because it’s been a very long time. I started seriously taking self-portraits, like for specific art purposes in maybe 2010? but I was definitely taking self-portraits way before that, maybe since I was like 14 or 15, but I didn’t start taking nude ones until I was 18 and older for obvious reasons. 

    I learned quickly that self-portraiture helps me feel more into my body and feel more connected to my emotions and myself, and part of that is because I feel like I’m more able to release all of everything else like societal bullshit and just be myself when I’m in front of a camera and it’s just me that’s taking the photos.

    It’s very different when I’m posing for someone else taking photos, because I feel more like, “oh, I need to take pictures that they will be happy with” but when it’s self portraits, I can do whatever I want because it’s me taking the photos. So it’s whatever I’m feeling and if I like them, I can share them. But if I don’t have to, and there’s no pressure of like, “oh I have this expectation from someone else”.

    So because I don’t have the limitations of someone else’s ideas of what they would like in these photos, I’m able to really connect with “Okay, how am I feeling today, in this moment? And how would I like to portray that in these images?” And sometimes I just take photos, and I never share them. And it’s just so that I can get emotions out, because sometimes I feel like it’s hard for me to just, like, sit in my emotions if I don’t have something that I’m doing to allow me to move through them, if that makes sense.

    I think it’s kind of hard to just be like, “Oh, I’m having feelings and this is it. Like I’m just experiencing them in my body” because I kind of tend to want to like do something else instead and push away the emotions but when I have the container of a photoshoot with myself, then I’m able to really like focus and be like, “okay, the whole purpose of this moment is for me to connect with myself and my emotions and my body, and how I’m feeling and move through those emotions in a way that allows me to express them in my body and that shows in the images”. And for me, usually the most powerful images that I’ve taken have been self-portraits where I’ve allowed myself to FEEL. 

    So yeah, that’s the cliff notes of how self-portraiture connects me to myself. I’m also able to kind of experiment with who I am and who I want to be, and if I want to pretend to be someone else, and express different parts of myself, because I feel like there aren’t a lot of chances for us to explore different facets of our personalities and our thoughts and desires. There’s not a lot of context for that most times, but if I’m taking self-portraits, it can be whatever I want it to be and I can be an evil villain or I can be an innocent child, or I can be totally myself or someone else. I can be anything and it doesn’t really matter because they’re photos that I’m taking for myself. So I feel way less pressure to create something specific and I can just, I can be all of those selves in one photo shoot if I want and I think that’s very special.

    So I hope you are inspired to take self portraits. I would love for you to do that. I would love to see what you create! I have a Discord server, I’ll link below, but if you’d like to take self-portraits and share them with people that appreciate art and nudity and self-portraiture, you can share them on my Discord, it’s free! You can join for free. Just come on and join us! Yeah, I’d love to see what you create.

    Share your self portraits! Click here to join us on Discord!

    If you would like to create self portraits in a group setting, where you are off doing your own thing, but then you can come back and communicate and collaborate with others or do a group self-portrait. We will be doing Conscious Creativity, August 27th and 28th in Ypsilanti, Michigan with Lior Allay and Roarie Yum. I’m so excited! This is gonna be our first in-person workshop since the pandemic started, so that’s quite an opportunity. I would love for you to join us if you’re able. I’ll share the Eventbrite information below. It has all the details of all the information you’ll need to know. But if there’s anything that you’re wondering about and the information is not the Eventbrite, just shoot me an email or comment below and I will do my best to get back to you and give you the information that you need. Yeah. I’m going to link the Eventbrite below. I’d love for you to join us. 

    All the information about Conscious Creativity is at this link!

    Let’s take self portraits together! August 27th and 28th, it’s 2days, they’re both half days. And yeah, I’m super stoked for this event. I’m very excited! So, if you’d like to join us, information’s below and I will talk to you soon. I love you! Bye!

    Create self portraits with me at Conscious Creativity!

    show your support for free:
    show your support financially (sliding scale!):

    read more
    Comments Off on How Self Portraiture Connects Me to Myself

  • Conscious Creativity 2022!

    July 9, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window (now with embedded captions!)

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends, I’m here today to talk about Conscious Creativity. 

    This is an event that I have put on since 2019 with Lior Allay, and this year in 2022, Roarie Yum will be joining us. So obviously in 2020 and 2021, they were online, but we’re able to go back in person this year and we’re so excited. The first in-person event was in 2019, and then, you know, the pandemic happened, so then we had to move online, but it’s in Michigan outside of Detroit. I think the closest town is Ypsilanti, Michigan. It’s near Ypsilanti Ann Arbor area is where the actual physical location that we’ll be at is.

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

    So, Conscious Creativity. It’s morphed and changed a little bit over the years, but the main focus of it is usually self portraiture and that’s what we’re going to focus on primarily for this year. It is going to be September 27 and 28 (edit: ITS ACTUALLY AUGUST! Silly me, keeping dates in my head is hard! Haha from now on all captioned dates will be the CORRECT DATES to avoid any confusion). It’s going to be two, both of those days, you can come one or both days. It will be at a permaculture farm called Crossing Hedgerows Sanctuary. That’s where we had the first one in 2019 in person and it was amazing. It’s a beautiful space. They have a lot of land and we’re able to be as naked as we want, which is super wonderful. So, the event is going to be two days and it’s a half day each day. We will be providing food and we will be providing a lot of education and resources and information and a wonderful experience for y’all.

    We don’t provide lodging and food before and after and that kind of thing, but while you’re there, we have food, we will be doing self portraiture, we’ll be doing set building, we’ll be doing group self-portraiture if you’re interested in doing that. Everything will be more like Choose Your Own Adventure. So you can participate in whichever parts seem interesting and exciting to you and nothing is mandatory. Just as long as you’re doing what feels best for you, that’s what we want to happen.

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

    So it’ll be, one of the days is in the morning and one of the days is in the evening. The evening day we’ll probably do a little bonfire at the end, if the weather cooperates. This event will be rain or shine! So, if it does rain, we do have some canopies that we’ll be able to be under so we’re not gonna be getting rained on the whole time. But if you want to be rained on, that’s okay too. If it rains. I just assumed maybe our photography equipment, like cameras and stuff will not want to be rained on but we’re hoping that it’ll be sunny. This far out we have no idea what the weather’s going to be. But I’m hoping it will be not raining so that we can run around the whole place and have no limits of where we can be.

    There will be I believe a composting toilet. So we’re not going to be inside of a building. We’re going to be outside the whole time and there will be bathroom facilities, but they will not be super fancy. That’s part of the magic of being outside is having that experience of being closer to Nature.

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

    I’m super excited for this opportunity to spend time with y’all and create with yall and make self-portraits together and separately. Whatever y’all are feeling. Let’s see, what else can I say about this. We’ll have a lot of resources and take home materials to give to yall. Most of them will be digital so you can just get an email with all of the things but we have a lot of PDFs and things that we would love to share with you like tips and tricks and meditations and things like that, so I’m extra excited.

    I hope that you join us for both days because we have created this experience to kind of like flow between both days. So the first day is we’re getting to know each other. We have a Welcome Circle. We all introduce ourselves, get to know each other, we’ll give tips and tricks on self portraiture and then we’ll kind of let everyone go and do their own self-portraiture adventure things and we’ll be available, the three of us, me, Lior, and Roarie, will be available for questions and feedback and that kind of thing because it’s a group workshop adventure we are not going to be available for one-on-one in-depth instruction since it’s a group experience. It will be more of like, we’re all going to come together as a group and ask questions and do things together and then we’ll kind of split off and do our own thing, but if you need some help you can wave us over, that kind of thing.

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

    Then the second day we’ll be doing set building and more self portraiture in the set if you want to be in this created space. You also have all of the nature available as well. And then at the very end of the second day, we’ll do a group self-portrait. If you’re interested in participating in that. That is always my favorite part! The group self-portraits! Just because it’s a really, like, connecting experience and it’s really wonderful to collaborate with multiple people at one time and it’s always just super fun and I love it.

    So I hope you will join us for Conscious Creativity 2022, August 27th and 28th. It’s on a weekend, so Saturday and Sunday in Ypsilanti, Michigan. I’ll have the Eventbrite link to share very soon. I’ll put it in the link below. We do have early bird pricing and I believe that’s going to be through the end of July. And then after, so August 1st and on will be the general admission prices. So if you would like a cheaper ticket, make sure to get it early for the early bird so that way you don’t have to pay as much. And that way we also have a better count of who’s going to be there so we know how much food to have. It’ll be a taco / salad bar. So there will be options for meat eaters, vegans and gluten-free options, so it should be able to cover most people’s dietary needs.

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

    Yeah, I’m just, I’m super excited. I don’t know if you can tell. I haven’t had a group in person experience like this since 2019, because of the pandemic and I’m just really excited to be here with all of y’all. And yay! I’m so excited! So, yeah, I hope you join us, all the information, I’ll link below and I will talk to you in another video very soon. Bye! 

    All the deatils about Conscious Creativity are here!

    EARLY BIRD PRICING THROUGH THE END OF THE MONTH!
    On August 1st general admission prices will begin!

    Conscious Creativity starts in:

     

     

    read more

  • Resources for Artists: How to Find Opportunities as an Artist

    February 26, 2022 /

    Click here to watch video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hey friends. Thanks for coming here again to my website. So happy you’re here! Excuse me. Hi. So, in my last Vlog, I talked a little bit about this residency that I’m applying for, by the time this video comes out. I will have already applied, but as I’m recording this I haven’t submitted it yet. I wanted to follow up about it because I think that, or, I’m pretty sure that a lot of people would like to put themselves out there in that way, for opportunities as an artist, but they don’t know where to freakin start at all. And don’t even know how to find these opportunities. So I wanted to share with you where I find them and how you can do it too.

    So there’s this amazing website called CaFE or call for entry. I believe it’s call for entry dot org. And what this website does, is it connects artists with a bunch of opportunities, things like residencies, things like workshops, public art, exhibits, grants, awards. All kinds of opportunities that are geared toward artists. So if you’re an artist and you are like, I really want to put my stuff in the gallery show, but I don’t know where to start you go to this call for entry website and sign up as an artist and then it’ll… you can search through all of the calls and you can search for certain kinds of calls, and if you only want to look for exhibits or if you only want to look for residencies, or if you want to look for anything at all that is potentially available to you. They have all kinds of stuff on there and there’s, it’s constantly being updated. That’s where I found both of the residencies that I’ve applied for. I applied for residency last year that I did not receive, which I was sad that I didn’t get it, but I also can’t expect myself to get everything that I want always. Especially if it was like my first time applying for a residency ever. But that experience applying for residency last year really helped me with applying for one this year because I already had my artist resume created. I already had a lot of like generic kind of responses written out for the kind of questions they would ask for residency. So this one they did have more questions and different questions, but it didn’t take me as long to complete this application than it did for the one that I did last year because I already had a lot of stuff already figured out and put together and I already had kind of figured out a system of how to like figure out what I’m going to even say. So that helped me a lot, just doing it last year, even if I didn’t get the residency, that really helped me to be able to do it this year a lot quicker and easier, and with less stress and less time.

    So back to call for entry. If you sign up as an artist, you can search. And you can also sign up for their email list, which is really helpful because they’ll send out like new opportunities to your email that they think might work for you. And they also, I think it’s the… it’s either the most recent things or the things that are about to be due, like expire in terms of like you have until this date to apply but they’ll send out a whole list of like, here’s a whole bunch of potential things that you could apply for that are due in the next two weeks, or month, or so. Or here’s a whole bunch of stuff that is brand new that you might want to apply for. So you can get emails sent to you of all these potential opportunities and then you can just scroll through your email be like, oh, this one sounds cool and click through and do your thing.

    Another cool thing about the call for entry website is the applications to all of these things like the residencies gallery shows, exhibitions, like workshops all the things, you apply through the website. So not only does it help you find the opportunities, but it also helps you like put yourself in the running for those opportunities. When you apply and say you submit images or something for your portfolio, it’ll have those images in this website already so you can just reuse them for different applications. If you want to use the same photos. So it’s helpful because everything is all in one place. Yeah. It’s been really helpful for me. I think it would be harder to find the opportunities if I was just searching randomly and I probably wouldn’t be able to see as many all in one place if I was just on the internet somewhere else.

    So this website is call for entry dot org, that’s spelled C-A-L-L-F-O-R-E-N-T-R-Y-(dot)-O-R-G. This is not a sponsored post or anything. I don’t think they do affiliates, but I just the site has helped me as an artist do I just wanted to share it with you. Yeah, I hope I get the residency we’ll see! And if not, I’ll take another failure because each failure gets me closer to a success and I learn with each one.

    So, yeah. Hopefully this helps you as an artist. If you’re wanting to get yourself out there. If you have any questions comment below or send me an e-mail, or you can like submit stuff through my survey. I’ll link that below and yeah. I hope you have a wonderful day! I’ll talk to you soon! Bye!

    Click here to check out the Call For Entry website!

    Click here to respond to my survey + help me create content you want to see!

    show your support for free:
    show your support financially (sliding scale!):

    read more

  • My Personal + Business Goals for 2022

    January 15, 2022 /

    Click here to watch video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hey friends! Last week I talked about making goals and this week I want to share with you what goals I’ve come up with for myself. These will probably change over time and I will probably add to them and change them and things like that. So this is like a working list and it doesn’t include everything but it’s a start. So I wanted to share with you and it’s okay if I don’t have everything figured out because it’s only January and we have a whole year and things change and that’s like a part of life and that’s okay and there’s nothing wrong with that. So I feel like it’s better to have some goals than to not have any at all and even if they change that’s okay because like everyone changes and learns and grows over time, so starting off with some goals whether or not they’re like permanent forever goals, at least there’s a start and that’s something to work off of.

    So, here are some of the goals that I came up with for myself. So, some personal goals that I have. I already talked to y’all about some of these, but I’m just going to go over all of them. So, personal goals. I want to journal every day. I want to do energy every day. I want to take a walk outside once a week or more. I really want to complete my tattoo or get closer to finishing it. I don’t know if that will be completed this year in 2022 just because of how much we have left. But at least continue that process to get closer to completing it. I want to connect more with friends. I want to like text my friends more, see them in person more, hang out with friends. Make more friends. I feel kind of lonely, so friend things, please yes.

    I have several online courses that I’ve signed up for that I want to complete. So those are some more personal goals when I complete those e-courses and I want to read at least 10 books. I think last year I read eight or nine books. I think I actually read more, but the ones that I wrote down were eight or nine. And I don’t know if I wrote all of the books down that I read. So. Yeah, I’m going to actually keep track of that this year. What books I’ve read. So I want to read more books. And those are the start of my personal goals list, at least.

    Business goals. So I like I said, I’ve kind of talked about some of this in the last video, but I’m going to review it a little bit. So business goals. I want to monetize my YouTube which means I need at least a thousand subscribers and at least 4,000 watch hours. So I’m going to plan to create one longer video a month. And at least one short every week in order to hopefully get closer to being able to monetize my YouTube channel.

    Click here to check out my YouTube channel!

    I want to continue doing these Vlogs every week for my website, for y’all because I love you. So a goal is to do a vlog every week. I would like to increase my total income. So I have a like a dollar amount goal to work towards. Right now I’m just like, I want to have a fifteen hundred dollar a month because most months I’m like hovering around a thousand bucks, so my goal is to increase that.

    I want to come up with one free thing to give to people every month. So whether that’s like a worksheet, a checklist, a video, like an online event, something just like one free thing for people every month because I feel like I don’t want to have everything behind a paywall. I want to be able to help people and I’m more able to help people if they have access to it for free. So, I want to make more free content.

    I have been dreaming about making a self-portrait online course, for probably three or four years now and I still haven’t done it. So that’s a goal, is to like work towards that this year, is launching an online course. I want to teach and facilitate more workshops, so that’s another goal is to do at least one or two or three workshops, whether online or in person, this year. I would really like to do that.

    I want to be on some people’s podcasts. I want to get my name out there that can be part of my, like, marketing strategy. Also podcasts are another way to get myself in front of more people. And also, a way to help more people if because, you know, hopefully the podcast that I’m on will be free. So another way to support people through what I know and the things that I can share. So I want to be on some podcasts. 

    Last year, I applied for I think two different residencies and I didn’t get either one, but I want to apply for more residencies because I would actually like to do a residency, an artist residency at some point. So I can only do that if I apply for them. So I have a goal of applying for residencies. And then I think I would really like to Mentor a queer artist like somebody who is just starting in the realm of art, photography, creativity. Since I’ve been doing this for over 10 years I have a lot of knowledge that I can share, so I would like to mentor a queer artist, so that will be another goal of mine.

    Yeah, okay. So those are some of my goals for 2022. I probably am going to update and change these overtime but that’s at least a start. And so, now that I have this list, I know what I can work towards and what things that I need to do on a more regular basis in order to meet those goals. 

    Yeah, goals are kind of hard and also awesome at the same time. I am the kind of person, I’m kind of a perfectionist and I… a lot of the time I struggle with not starting something because I want to do it perfectly, so I just don’t start it at all because I’m scared of failing. So I just don’t do it. And if I think about it, if I don’t start at all, that’s immediately a failure. So I’m like… I’m failing myself before I even start, so I want to not do that.

    And I want to actually, I want to fail. I want to fail some. I want to get some nos. I want to like… I want to apply for things and have people reject me because that’s the only way that I’m going to get over this, is if I actually do it and get rejected and be like, okay, I’ve learned something. Now I can work on something else and continue to get better. So yeah, maybe another goal is to fail some because I need practice with that, because it’s better to fail and learn something than to not try at all. 

    And I’m still learning this for myself, but I wanted to share with you a lot of these things that I share that are like, inspirational and helpful and things like that. It’s also for me because I need help too. And sometimes I need to just listen to my own videos so that I can help myself. So yeah, okay.

    Yeah, so thank you for listening to my goals and I hope that you can set some awesome goals for yourself. And, yeah, I love you so much! Thank you for being here! If you have anything you’d like to share with me, like, goals that you have set or questions that you have about my goals, you can comment below. I’m also going to put the link to my survey below. If there’s anything in particular you want to hear from me. That way I can make the content that you want to see! So link to the survey is down there. Okay. I love you so much! Thank you for being here! *mwah*

    Click here to respond to my survey + help me create content you want to see!

    read more
    Comments Off on My Personal + Business Goals for 2022

  • Why Self Portraits Are Important To Me

    October 16, 2021 /

     

    Click here to watch this video in another window.

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! I thought that since I have the self portrait workshop coming up at The Light Factory on October 23rd here in Charlotte, in person. So this will be my first in-person Workshop in a few years, I’m very excited!  But since I have that coming up, I wanted to talk about self portraits and why I take them and why they’re important to me.

    So to give you a little back story, if you’re new. Wow, these mosquitoes are coming after me right now. If you’re new here, I’ve been taking self-portraits since 2010, maybe a little bit before. Actually, definitely before since I got a camera when I was 16, so that was in what? 2006? 2007? 2006… 2006. So even though I was probably taking naked self portraits before I was 18 that I will not share because I was underage and that’s really creepy for other people to see. 

    Self portraits have been really important to me. At first, when I was younger, when I first started taking photos at first, it was just, I was the easiest subject to find for my photos. I didn’t have to have another person with me to take photos of them. I could just take photos of me to practice and learn my camera. But as time went on, I learned that I somehow felt more connected to myself when I took self portraits. I feel like I could learn more about myself and experience my emotions in a deeper way through self portraiture.

    And I think that’s because a lot of times when I’m feeling something and experiencing something I don’t have a mirror or camera in front of me, so it’s all kind of abstract like in my head and in my mind and in my body with like the way that I was feeling… but once I started taking self-portraits, the way that I felt became something that I could see and seeing it helped me experience it more.

    I don’t know if you have heard of aphantasia, but I have aphantasia, which is where you don’t have a Mind’s Eye. So I can imagine things, but I can’t see anything when I’m thinking about it. Like I can’t see anything in my head, I can’t visualize. I can like, remember what things are like, because I’ve seen them before and I like, remember it, but I don’t actually see anything in my head. I can’t like, oh, I’m going to imagine a unicorn with rainbow hair and sparkles and it’s going to be prancing across on a rainbow.

    Like, I can think about those things, but I can’t see them in my head. And it took me a while to realize that that’s not a normal thing… or well, okay, maybe I don’t want to say that. It took me a while to realize that people could actually see things in their head and I couldn’t. Self portraiture, since I don’t visualize self portraiture helps me actually like make the things that I think about or the ways that I feel more tangible and more real, because I can see them because a lot of times things don’t quite feel real if I’m just thinking about them. But once it’s something that’s visible and tangible than it becomes a lot more real to me. 

    And I, I got into a much deeper relationship with myself through self portraiture when I was on my cross country road trip in 2019. I was going through a lot like, personally, emotionally, romantically. Yeah, mentally, like life things were pretty wild. That was during my Saturn return. If you’re into astrology, at all, you know that a Saturn Return usually like turns your life upside down, or it can.. and it definitely turned mine upside down. So, I was processing a lot of feelings and a lot of like, Unknown. And I was able to process in a much deeper way because I took so many self portraits on that road trip. 

    And I learned so much about myself. I mean, if you’ve been around since then, you know that I realized I was non binary like right after I came home from that trip. It really helped me get to know myself and understand myself on a deeper level, through actually being in my body and allowing myself to feel all my feelings while I was taking self portraits and then looking through them later, realizing oh wow, I’m a real person, I have real feelings, and I can see that, and I can like experience that all over again when I look at the photos. So self portraits mean a lot to me. They have allowed me to connect to myself in a deeper way than I ever have been able to before. 

    And I took a bunch of self-portraits either at the end of 2020 or early 2021 that I haven’t gone through yet, that I’ve talked about already, that I have a members only like webinar hangout thing where we’re gonna go through them together. I’ve already scheduled it, you’ll get a post about it when it’s coming up, I have like notifications that I’ll come onto the website to remind you like hey, this is happening soon! So that’ll be in like mid-November (the 18th at 6pm EST!).

    But those self portraits took that we’ll be looking through are really emotional and really personal to me and I’m feeling emotional thinking about them. Yeah, I really let myself feel all of my feelings when I was taking those photos and it was kind of scary and it was definitely vulnerable and I’m kind of nervous to share them with you, especially in their raw form where I haven’t done anything to them and can see all of them. But I’m also kind of excited, because I don’t really want to hide myself from y’all, like you’re supporting me so much by being here, so the least I can do is not hide myself from you. 

    So, I hope you join me in November (the 18th at 6pm EST!) when we go through those photos together because it’s going to be scary, but it’s gonna be awesome! They’re pretty dark, and I definitely cried when I was taking them, and yeah, it’s gonna be a lot but it’s going to be great. 

    To give you a little tiny bit more information about them before I end this video. I took them in my sister’s house after she moved out, and it was empty, before she sold it. And that’s where I was living when a lot of not-so-great things happened to me, and I had some not so great experiences there, so it was like my Releasing that house and the feelings that I felt in that house through feeling my feelings and taking self portraits in the house once it was empty. So it was a great release for me. And yeah, I’m laughing because I’m like trying to hold back tears. 

    Yeah, so I feel like self portraits are really important for me personally, in order to more fully embody how I feel and to more fully experience my life through creating them. So I hope you have enjoyed this video of me being kind of emotional and talking about self portraits. Yeah. 

    I think that’s all I have to say right now. I really appreciate that you’re here. It means the world to me. I couldn’t do any of this without you, so I appreciate you and I hope you enjoy what I share. I love you!

    read more
    Comments Off on Why Self Portraits Are Important To Me