• May Schedule!

    May 1, 2023 /
    Events all in eastern time:
    • Weds May 10th @ 6 pm:  Self Portraiture for Ecosexual Embodiment – virtual event co-facilitated with Lior Allay, part 4 of 4! This class has been AMAZING so far, I can’t believe we’re on the last one already! We’ll be discussing GENDER + SEXUALITY through self portraiture
    • Thurs May 11th @ 12 pm: Tattoo appointment with Alex Santaloci at Iron Ghost Tattoo (will either be my last or my second to last tattoo appointment for my half body Poplar tree tattoo!!!!)
    • Sat May 13th @ 10 am: Photo Bloom: Self Portrait Workshop – in person in Mooresville, NC – I’m teaching the self portrait workshop and we’ll have 4 custom created sets for attendees to take self portraits in!
    • Tues May 16th @ 7 pm: Queen City Kinky Photography Meetup – in person in Charlotte, NC – hang out and talk photography
    • Thurs May 18th @ 6 pm: LIMINAL Opening Reception – 5 of my double exposure photographs are in this exhibition, including a self portrait!
    • Mon May 22nd @ 6 pm: Queen City Kinky Photography Model/Photographer Etiquette Workshop – in person in Charlotte, NC – learn how to have safe(r) and successful photoshoots from either side of the lens – this is a prerequisite to our future group shoot events
    • Weds May 24th @ 7 pm: Self Portrait Showcase – virtual event co-facilitated with Lior Allay – submit your self portraits to share, all experience levels welcome!
    • May 26th – 29th: IGNITE BURN – I will be teaching a self portrait class one of the days of the burn!
    Click the name of the event for all the info!
    Patrons: see THIS POST for 40% off the self portrait course!
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  • February Schedule!

    January 30, 2023 /
    Online events coming up that are FREE/DISCOUNTED for patrons (all in eastern time):
    Queer Creative Coworking is a registration-only event held on Zoom via Eventbrite
    The movie screening is a member-only (including FREE, not-on-patreon members!) event held on Discord video/voice chat (VC)
    Self Portraiture for Ecosexual Embodiment is a 4 part live online course co-facilitated with Lior Allay held on Zoom via Eventbrite
    Click the name of the event for all the info!
    Patrons: see THIS POST for the discount code to get free tickets for coworking, and THIS POST for 40% off the self portrait course!
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  • 2022 Recap!

    January 9, 2023 /

    I did a 2021 recap last year and was really encouraged by it, so I’m doing another one this year! I have issues with object permanence and it’s easy for me to feel like I’ve done NOTHING, so looking back and writing up the major things that happened and the things that I accomplished is really helpful for me to realize that I did, in fact, DO THINGS!

    I created this to help myself realize that I am accomplishing things all the time even though I feel like I haven’t. I did NOT create this to make you feel like you need to compete with me or for you to compare yourself to me. The last thing I want is to make someone else feel bad about themself. Everyone’s life and journey is different, and we are ALL VALID whether or not we accomplished ANYTHING AT ALL. ♥

    This post contains affiliate links. This means I may earn a commission should you choose to make a purchase using my link (at no extra cost to you!). I only recommend things I have personally used + love!

    • Journaled every day (I started this Jan 20th 2020 – almost on year 3!)
    • Energy practices (almost) every day
    • Took many walks outside + at parks
    • Spent time w friends
    • 8 tattoo appointments – so much closer to being done with this massive project!
    • Went to Floyd Yoga Jam
    • Visited a friend in Boone
    • Got covid in August for the first (and hopefully only) time
    • Visited AD in DC x2
    • Solo van camping trip to Shenandoah
    • Solo van camping in Hocking Hills
    • Got STI tested in Feb, May, + Dec
    • Went to an Art Walk in my hometown
    • Went to friends + familys bday parties
    • Went to a family reunion in VA for my dad’s side of the family
    • Got a new passport with my name change and X gender marker!
    • Volunteered at the VAPA Center
    • Dyed my pubic hair blue x2
    • Spent over $2500 on van repairs (oil changes, inspection, window motor, fuel line, tires…)
    • Mountain trip with Abe at airbnb +  mushroom experience
    • 3x mushroom trips + microdosed several times
    • Helped set up and break down Sol Harmony Fest, my first time seeing behind the scenes of how a festival comes to life!
    • Housesit for my aunt while she’s out of town x2
    • Asheville trip w Abe (surprise trip that last minute changed but was still super fun)
    • Mountainpalooza with 15 of my high school friends! (year 4 and counting!)
    • Stayed w Granny for a week to help her out after she was in the hospital w pneumonia
    • Hosted a model + her partner, first time hosting in several years – since 2017/18?
    • Van camped w friends 5 different times
    • First group van camping experience! 13 people and 4 dogs in a mountain forest
    • Went to 2 bonfires with friends
    • Abe and I made a Duct Tape Dummy of myself

    Let me know what you’d like to see from me in 2023 by responding to my survey!

    • AD tied + suspended me for the first time in years, my first suspension since my rope injury in 2016, first time at The Crucible
    • Got back into the local kink scene + started going to play parties
    • Got myself a doggie crate for my bedroom, for claustrophilia reasons, also for putting myself in time out reasons, and kink reasons lol
    • Did my first self suspension in rope
    • Went to PUSH – a fetish party in Durham
    • Went to 4 kink parties
    • Went to 5 rope labs
    • Had 3 rope mentoring sessions (so far)

    I was only able to accomplish these things because of the support from members of my patreon, thank you so much!

    • Anti-planning Workshop w Elizabeth Goddard
    • Yoni Massage Workshop w Lior Allay
    • Nude Yoga (virtual) w Lior Allay
    • Feelings 101 w Dawn Serra
    • Advanced Master Program on the Treatment of Trauma from NICABM (5 part master class)
    • How to Build Your Business Without Social Media w Becca Tracey
    • Thai Massage Workshop w Ann Marie
    • Balls + Yoga w Ann Marie
    • Glow Yoga w Meridith Young
    • Laughter Yoga w Carolyn Keller Sells
    • Plant ID Walk – Know Your Weeds w I-TAL Acres
    • Psychedelic Breathwork w Monica McGee + Kendall Selfe
    • Ecstatic Dance w Katie Wells + Beatfarm3r
    • Howdy! Partner Yoga w Shawn + Marie Nuthall
    • Energy Medicine Yoga w Nicole Lafon
    • Nature Walk – Plants, Food, + Fire w Johnny Stowe
    • Defying Gravity: Acroyoga FUNdamentals w Kaelyn Rogers
    • Intuitive Movement w Claire Nagy-Kato
    • Teas Tonics + Tinctures w Willow Luna (my mom!)
    • Psychedelic Integration w Anjali Valea
    • Chakti Yoga w Lauren Nixon
    • Rhythm + Flow Yoga w Amber + Jimi Nedoff
    • Learned a suspendable futomomo and uplines (thanks AD)
    • Found a local rope mentor + started recurring meetings to learn rope bondage
    • Aftercare is a “bad word” w Zir Oya aka @mount.saintoya via Shibari Study
    • Rope Has an Image Problem w Christian Red via Shibari Study

    Check out the organized list of HUNDREDS of books I want to read!

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  • LIVE Online Course: Embodied Self Portraiture

    January 4, 2023 /

    Leave perfectionism for possibility

    Transform the way you see + experience yourself through the medium of self portraiture.

    ***Members of my patreon get a discount code for 40% off!***

    Shift from performative living to authentic thriving

    Give us 4 months + you’ll fall in love with your unique body.

    Rewrite the stories your body holds, learn the language of encoded memory, + work intentionally to craft a new reality where beauty is defined by what delights YOU.

    Topics include: Inspiration, Somatics, Creativity, Ritual, Set Design, Composition, Storytelling, Gender, Sexuality + SO much more!

    SIGN UP HERE

    Each class comes with…

    • PDF e-book of course material w/ interactive exercises
    • Creative Change Tracker to watch your evolution unfold
    • a take home recording if you can’t be there
    • LIVE Q+A opportunities

    You will need…

    • A device to access the live video feed or recording
    • Something to take notes on
    • A camera (phones count too!)

    SIGN UP HERE 

    • You have trouble connecting with your emotions + want to understand yourself better
    • You want to release perfectionism + express yourself creatively w/ confidence
    • You’re curious about your gender or identity +/ want to know who you are with clarity
    • You want to transform your relationship w/ the camera, release shyness, + BOLDLY embrace your beauty

    SIGN UP HERE

    • You’re under 18 years old
    • You need extensive education about photography – this is not a photo 101 course
    • You need their hand held the entire time – this is not one on one support
    • You are not willing to do the exercises/practices/homework etc.

    1. Feb 8 – personal self-portrait journey, why nudity, technical + safety info
    2. March 8 – creative, posing, composition, storytelling
    3. April 12 – healing, somatics, + ceremony
    4. May 10 – gender + sexuality

    If you come to 3, the 4th is free!

    SIGN UP HERE

    Q: What do I need to bring?

    A: A journal to take notes, comfy layered clothes to adjust your temp, a water bottle, a snack, a private space to explore… anything else that would support you in listening + learning!

    Q: If I’ve never done self portraits can I still come?

    A: Yes! Absolutely, if you’re open to new experiences and willing to learn, we’re happy to have you! This experience is flexible, offering challenges to engage those who already have a confident grasp of photography, while being equally inviting for folks who are just getting started. This is the perfect place for creatives of all levels to co-mingle and learn from each other. We are all both students and teachers, always.

    Q: What if I don’t have a camera?

    A: No problem! If you have a smartphone, you have a camera!

    Q: How do I get the 4th workshop for free?

    A: If you sign up for the first 3 workshops, we’ll send you an email with a discount code for 100% off the 4th one! Make sure to wait to sign up for the 4th one so we can send you the discount code!

    Q: What if I can’t attend the workshops on the designated days/times?

    A: No worries if you can’t be there at the time of the workshop, they will all be recorded and emailed to everyone who signs up whether you attend live or not.

    I WANT TO BE A PART OF THIS! SIGN ME UP!

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  • Hiding from people in public

    October 5, 2022 /

    Creating nude self portraits in public outdoor spaces has it’s own challenges, such as scrambling to hide from people so they don’t catch you! Since I love taking behind the scenes videos of my shoots, I’ve caught some of these instances on video.

    Enjoy this compilation video of me realizing people are nearby! I just made it today!

    I’m enjoying making compilation videos lately, would you like to see more of them? What kinds of compilations would you like to see?

    Click here to watch the video if it’s not loading above

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  • Why Diverse Nude Art Is Important

    August 20, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends! I’m here this week to talk about why I think it’s important for us to be able to see more diverse people naked.

    Obviously, I am of the group of people that has some of the most privileges in this world. I’m white, able-bodied, thin, “conventionally attractive”, whatever the fuck that means. So it’s easier for people who look like me to be naked and be accepted for their nudity, but for people that have more intersections than I do, people that are Black, Brown, Indigenous, people of color in general, people with disabilities… are less visible in art because of many reasons, racism, sexism, like all of the things.

    If more people made art of people that look different than me: people with bigger bodies, people with darker bodies, people with visible disabilities, if more art was made of people like them, then I believe that people would be more accepting and understanding of a wide range of human experiences. And I also believe that if more people of intersecting experiences are able to see art of people that look like them, then it’s probably going to be easier for them to feel like they are accepted and like they are important and like they are art.

    I believe that all bodies are good bodies and that all bodies are model bodies, and I really would love to see more art of people that look different from me. I think it’s very important. I believe that the more diverse models that can be seen by society, the better off society will be. Obviously, like diversity equity and inclusion is kind of the thing right now, for a bunch of reasons. But it’s true. We need diversity. We need equity and inclusion. We need people to make art that is of a variety of different humans, and not just people that look like me.

    Because if it’s just of people that look like me, then all of these, racism, sexism, fatphobia, ableism. Those things are going to continue to run rampant because it’s just going to be compounded on itself.

    We need people to make art and share art and see art that includes people that look different from me. I am like “the norm” in art and I’m fucking tired of it, it is boring. I want to see more diverse people in art, and the more diverse art can be, the more incredible the art community will be, the more stories we’ll hear and the more we’ll learn, and the more we’ll understand other people’s experiences. I think art is kind of a universal language. And if we can see art that includes a variety of different people, then we’ll all be better off for it.

    Please make art if you are anybody that looks different from me! Please make art! Please make nude art! Please make self-portraits! Please make something that is different from me! I’m tired of seeing people that look like me in art! I want to see something else! Obviously, people that look like me in art are still good things, but I’m tired of it being the only art that is accepted and the only art that is seen as important, because that is not true. Art is for everybody. 

    If you would like to make art with me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum, we are hosting a workshop in Ypsilanti Michigan on August 27 + 28 called Conscious Creativity. We’ll be creating self-portraits and also creating self-portraits in a group. Come and join us! If you can’t afford it, fill out our application for a scholarship. We would like to have you come! All the information is on the Eventbrite, I’m going to link it below.

    Art is important and the more diverse it can be, the better off humanity will be! Thank you.

    I want to be a part of Conscious Creativity! I want to learn more!

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  • Why Nude Art Is Important To Me

    August 13, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends! Today I am talking about why nudity, specifically, is important to me in art and why I think it’s important to have nude art and participate in nude art and make nude art. 

    So, obviously there’s a bunch of kinds of art and I know that social media has kind of suppressed nudity and nude art specifically for probably a lot of reasons that I don’t agree with, but I believe that nude art is extremely important partially because it is literally the oldest form of art. The oldest art that has been discovered is of a nude body, it’s a statue and… you should check it out, go on the internet and search for oldest art. Since the beginning of art, since humans have been making art, they have been making art of nude bodies.

    I think that it’s important to show that nudity is not inherently sexual. That nudity can be for any variety of reasons. I mean sexuality can be part of that, but if that’s not an inherent part of nudity. Having nude art, to me, shows that our bodies are good. These are good bodies, no matter what your body looks like, no matter what shape size color ability. All bodies are good bodies. To me all bodies are model bodies. And if you’re able to be nude and create art and share that, then people that look like you can see that they are art too. 

    Our culture really tries to make us feel like we have to buy things and do a bunch of things in order to make our bodies better and in order to make our bodies “good”. They just want to sell us shit. They want us to have low self-esteem and buy all their things so that we can try to be better people, but being a good person has nothing to do with external visual things. Being a good person is what’s on the inside. 

    I feel like when I’m naked, I can more easily share what’s inside of me, on the outside. I don’t have anything to hide. I’m not covering my Self. I’m fully me and I feel like I can be more fully present when I’m nude. I feel like when I’m nude, I can feel into my body more, in a sensual way, and if I have clothes on it numbs that. Because my body is like, “oh it’s clothes. I’m just going to ignore the feeling of clothes because they’re there and it’s going to be a long time that they’re on.” So my body stops sensing as much. But when I’m nude, I feel like I can feel the breeze on my skin. My own touch. I can feel the sun, the warmth of the sun on my skin. I can feel if “oh, hey there’s an ant crawling up my leg”. I just feel like I’m more able to be in my body and feel in my body when I’m nude and to me, that’s a part of art, is if I can be fully myself and create art in that way, it’s that much more powerful than if I was pretending to be something else.

    Yeah, I think nude art is really important. I think the more people that can see nude art and understand or experience that nudity is not inherently sexual, then maybe we’ll have less traumatic experiences. Maybe we’ll have less shame. Maybe we’ll be less self conscious. To me nude art is really important, and the more of us that can make it and share it and look at it, the better. 

    If you would like to make a nude art with me, me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum are hosting a workshop in Ypsilanti, Michigan, on August 27th and 28th in person, and we’ll be creating self-portraits individually and as a group, so if you would like to be a part of that, I have all the information below in the Eventbrite. If there’s anything that you’re curious about that is not answered by the Eventbrite, please let me know. I’d be happy to answer your questions. 

    Yeah, please join us! We would love to have you there. I’m so excited to make art with you! Yay, and we can be naked and outside! And yeah, we’re going to be on a farm, it’s like a permaculture farm / sanctuary, and they are fully cool with us being totally naked. We have permission to be naked in this space. So if you would like to join, the information is below. I hope to see you there. Bye!

    This sounds wonderful! I want to be a part of Conscious Creativity!

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  • How I Begin In Person Nude Events

    August 6, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello friends, welcome to my vlog. Today I’m going to talk about how I facilitate nude events in groups, and how I make sure that the space is safe and… or as safe as it can be, nothing is ever truly safe. But how I start them and how it impacts the rest of the event and why I start them in this specific way.

    So I always like to set intentions for the space and always start out in a circle of everyone that’s there so we can introduce ourselves, so that we can set our intentions for the day, for the space, for the photoshoot, for whatever the event is, and also so that we can communicate our boundaries and our needs and our desires. I think that’s super important that we all start off on the same page. That way there’s no question of like, “is this person okay with this?” “Is this person not okay with that?” That way we all know going into the experience, what the expectations are and how we can move forward from there.

    So I usually like… I think circles are great. That way everyone can see everyone else and we’re all even and no one’s above someone else and telling everyone else what to do. I do facilitate these events and have a structure to them, at least somewhat of a structure, but I don’t want to be like the overseer and the overlord and tell everyone what to do. That’s not my style. I like it to be collaborative.

    So we start off in a circle and we introduce ourselves with our name and our pronouns, and then we go into what we’re excited about for the day, what we’d like to do, things that we know that we don’t want to do, what we’re comfortable with and what we’re not. Everyone goes in a circle and shares their perspective on what they’re wanting to do and what their boundaries are. And that way when we come together as a group to create self-portraits or whatever art we’re doing, everyone knows how to behave and what is expected and what needs to happen in order for everyone to have a good experience.

    Self-portraits are the best and group self-portraits are even better, so if you would like to join in on one of these experiences me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum are hosting Conscious Creativity in person in Ypsilanti, Michigan on August 27th and 28th, and we are super excited! I have a lot of information about it in a bunch of places, but I’m going to link the Eventbrite below because it has all of the information you’ll need, but if you would like to join us, we will be taking self-portraits and we’ll be taking group self-portraits together. So, if you want to participate in that, please join us! We would love to have you! I’ll link everything below. Please come!!!

    Join us for Conscious Creativity!

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  • How It Feels To Take Self Portraits In A Group

    July 30, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window (now with embedded captions!!!)

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi, friends! Today I’m going to talk about how it feels to take self portraits in a group.

    This is something that I have experienced several times in my life. I’ve hosted nude gatherings in person and online, and taken self-portraits in groups for several years and to me, it’s one of my favorite things to do so I wanted to talk about why I love it so much!

    So self portraits, I’ve already talked about why I love them in general, but specifically self-portraits in a group of people to me is really special because the collaboration and the communication and the energy of being in a group of people and making art together is really special. There’s something magical about meeting people, sometimes for the first time, and over the course of a few hours getting to know them and getting close with them, and feeling comfortable enough to like merge our bodies together to create some kind of art is just, *muah* I love it. It’s incredible.

    Some of my favorite experiences have been taking self-portraits in a group of people. For instance, I did a nude gathering outside of Portland, Oregon at a nude beach in 2019. And we roamed around the beach and took a bunch of photos, and then at the end we all made a huge cuddle pile on the beach and took photos together, and that was like, amazing! And most of those people I had never met before, and I felt comfortable enough by the end of the day to be naked and cuddled up with all of them, that it was just, it was such a connecting experience and I felt so comfortable in myself and in my body and with these humans that are lovely that I just, it was yeah, it was amazing. I hope you get to experience something like this. 

    I’ve also done a nude gathering at my house in Charlotte, here, this is technically my backyard. In the house, because it was a pretty hot day, I think it was in August of 2019 when I did that nude gathering. That also was, we created together and by the end of the day we had a naked cuddle pile. Those are my favorite! They’re my favorite. I’m a really like physical touch, cuddly person, and the fact that you can get to know someone and get close to them and feel safe with them and it be multiple someones, and by the end of the day have a good… what’s the word I’m looking for? Like a good relationship with them enough, that you feel safe to be naked and like cuddled up with them for photos. It’s the best. I love, I love it so much and the energy of just being in a group of people creating all together is really special. 

    So excited. Also in 2019, we had Conscious Creativity for the first time. Me and Lior Allay hosted it and that was in Ypsilanti, Michigan. And we, again, people that we hadn’t met before creating all together and by the end of the experience, we were all together in a group taking self-portraits. And yeah, it’s just so special. I’m really excited to say that Conscious Creativity in Ypsilanti, Michigan is happening again in person this year in 2022, August 27th and 28th. If you would like to join us, the whole premise of Conscious Creativity for this year is taking self-portraits, and at the end of the experience we’ll be doing a group self-portrait.

    YAY! Conscious Creativity!

    So, if you would like to participate in one of these experiences, please join us. We would love to have you. I’ll put all the information below. Yeah, if you have any questions that are not answered by all the information on the Eventbrite, let me know. You can email me or put a comment here on this blog. Yeah, I’m so excited, please join us. Let’s take self-portraits together in a group! I’m so excited! Okay. Thank you so much! I love you and I will talk to you soon! Bye!

    Join us for Conscious Creativity! Details + tickets are at this link!

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  • Why I Don’t Model Much Anymore

    July 23, 2022 /

    Click here to watch the video in another window (now with embedded captions!)

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi, friends! Today I am excited to talk about why I don’t really model much anymore. 

    I have not officially retired, but I am super extra incredibly picky about who I will pose for and honestly, it’s not very many people. So I don’t really model much anymore for a few reasons, but some of them are… I feel like I have kind of… 

    Posing for other people has kind of run its course for me. I used to super enjoy it, it was a really fun adventure. I really liked meeting new people and helping them create art in whatever way that they were excited to create and posing for them. But now, it doesn’t feel as exciting for me anymore to make art for other people. I’m much more interested in making art for myself, which is why I prefer self-portraiture. 

    Another reason is, I’ve had my gender realization and I’m agender. I’m like, I’m a trans person. I’m non-binary, agender. I’m not a woman, and I feel like most photographers that want to hire me see me as a woman and are not really capable or willing to see the full spectrum of who I am. And kind of want to push a feminine idea and feminine imagery on me, which I’m no longer willing to participate in. It was okay before, I was never really comfortable with it, and then, when I had my gender understanding it became a lot more clear that, yeah, I’m just really not willing to feminize myself for other people’s art.

    So that’s probably one of the main reasons why I basically only model for women and trans people now because I feel like they see me more as who I am instead of who they want me to be. It’s not that there are men who can’t like… there are men who can see me as me, but I feel like the majority of them are just kind of guys with cameras who just want to take photos of a naked woman and that’s not me. I am naked but I’m not a woman. Posing for other people is not as exciting and fun for me as it used to be. And that’s the primary reason why I don’t really model much anymore. I’d rather take self portraits. 

    If you would like an opportunity to take self-portraits with me, we… me and Lior Allay and Roarie Yum are hosting Conscious Creativity in Ypsilanti Michigan, in person on a permaculture farm. I’m so excited, August 27th and 28th. It’s a two-day workshop. I have a lot of information about it in other vlogs and on the Eventbrite that I’ll link below. But if you are curious about self portraiture, and if you would like to take self portraits and have all of my tips and tricks for those, and also the opportunity to take self portraits in a group with me and Lior and Roarie, join us! Buy a ticket, come to Ypsilanti and pose with us, take self portraits with us! I’m very excited. I’ll put all the information below, but I don’t want to ramble on about Conscious Creativity because I have more information about that in other places, but if you’d like to join us, I’ll link it below.

    More info about Conscious Creativity

    I hope you enjoyed this video. And if you’re a cis male photographer who would like to hire me as a model, I hope this helps you understand why I probably said no. Not that I have anything against cis males, like cis men, but I just feel like women and trans people can see me as who I am. And yeah, it just feels more fulfilling to create art with people who can understand me, than people who want to like, push something onto me. I love you so much and I will talk to you soon! Bye!

    Join me, Lior, and Roarie for Conscious Creativity on August 27 + 28! All the details are here 💖

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