• MASS UPLOAD!!! + member’s only event scheduled

    March 6, 2021 /

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! It’s been a while, or it feels like it has because I pre-recorded the last couple of vlogs I did on here, but HIII!! So it’s officially March, which means that the changes have been started for my website. I still have a lot of work to do in terms of redoing my website, but I’ve already done a mass upload, so everything that was in First Look is now available for everyone! Which is really exciting because it was literally a fuck ton of things. I haven’t even counted but it’s like, a LOT. I kinda wanna see if I can find how many things it is… um…. 55 photosets and let’s see how many videos… 34 video folders, which means that most of those have multiple videos in them. It’s a fuck ton of things, literally like so many things! Right now I’m only uploading the First Look stuff. I still have a backlog that’s not as much content as this but it’s still the backlog that no one has seen yet, that I’ll be uploading later this month. I just wanted to go ahead and get First Look in there for yall because it’s a whole lot and I love the content that’s in there and just excited to share it with you. It’s so much, it’s kindof overwhelming. I’m going to link the directories in this post, because I’m not going to link every single photoset and video because that would take forever and I just did that for the 34 video folders and the how many was it? 55 photosets, I’ve already done that for the directory. So I’ll link to the directories below, there’s a photo directory and a video directory, and from there you can find what you want to look at. I have everything listed, you just click it and see things like you usually do in the directory. I’m really excited, it’s so much, so much!

    Let’s see, what else do I want to tell you? So this month also marks the beginning of our members only video hangout community education learning together, I don’t know what I want to call it yet, but video hangouts for us as members of my website, so excited! So I think I’ll be scheduling it for next Saturday the 13th, 1pm eastern. Very excited. It’ll be one hour of us hanging out and I think I’m going to have the topic as ecosexuality so we can have a whole conversation around that. I’ve already written down a lot of questions to ask yall that we can discuss together about ecosexuality. I’m going to go ahead and also link the zoom link invite thing down below. I’ll also resend that zoom link, I’m going to schedule a couple posts to remind yall that it’s next Saturday at 1pm and you gotta use the link to join so there’s that, I’m excited.

    I’m hoping maybe I’ll be able to have my rebranding of my website, redoing my website, I’m hoping to have it done by April? Maybe? And then hopefully also in April I might start doing nude gatherings, virtual nude gatherings. Nude gatherings was what I was really gung ho set on doing and moving forward with at the end of 2019 after doing a couple in 2019 in person and then covid happened and you know the rest. So I’m excited to take nude gatherings to the virtual realm! We’re going to see how that goes. I think I might start doing those in April maybe? Hopefully? I’ll of course let you know. The virtual nude gatherings, the official ones that I don’t have any dates for yet, hoping to maybe start in April. Those will be available for the public to pay to join, and I’m also going to have a discount code that I will give to all of yall so you can get in for free. Those nude gatherings you’ll have to sign up via the eventbrite link eventually once I make the site, so that’s coming, I just wanted to give you a head’s up because I’m excited.

    I do like doing these vlogs when I have things to tell you because I personally as a consumer of content really like to have a visual and audio thing to pay attention to instead of just reading so I like to offer that to yall so you have this and the transcript of this below so I’ll be doing that and uh…. *shrugs* anytime I have things to really talk to you about that are anything lengthy at all. If it’s short like “reminder! The member’s only gathering will be this day this time! Reminder!” If it’s that kind of thing I won’t do a video like this, but if it’s something like “hey let’s talk about something” I’ll probably do a video because I like to receive this kind of content so I hope that you also do.

    What else do I want to say? I think that’s about it right now so… RECAP!
    Lots and lots and lots of new content is now available for everyone to see, which is all of the First Look. The backlog that I have I’ll be uploading later this month, it’ll be part 2. It’s not as much as this, but this will take you a while to go through. Maybe I’ll do the backlog in April because this is just a lot. We’ll see. Either way I’ll let you know. Go enjoy the first look that is now… actually the first look folder no longer exists because it’s available for everybody now. I’ll be rebranding, redoing my website soon hopefully. I’ll start doing our members only events which will be once a month and the first one is next Saturday the 13th at 1pm eastern time and hopefully maybe April I’ll start doing virtual nude gatherings that yall will be able to access for free. So.. excited! I hope you’re excited too! I don’t know when I’ll be updating yall next, but here’s this. Yall have a LOT to look at. Okay, bye!!

    EDIT/ADDITION: It’s official, the member’s only event will be a VIRTUAL NUDE GATHERING (and we’ll discuss ecosexuality)!!! AHHHHHH!!!!! I’m stoked yall! In 2019 after facilitating 3 in-person nude gatherings I decided that they were the direction I wanted to go, they were the times that I LIVE for. We all know what happened in 2020. I’m so ready for the adventure + challenge of bringing these events online. So looking forward to seeing you there. <3

    Enjoy these samples from the mass upload, there are 55 photosets + 34 video folders, this small sample doesn’t even scratch the surface!!!!!!

    (Lior Allay double exposed with Bryce Canyon during the Backstage Pass event for GBTL)

    (Leopold, Canischromatis, Anon, Anon, + me – self portrait during Creative Nude Gathering Aug 2019)

    (self portrait on medium format film from the panoramic pinhole camera I made in college with my dad)

    (self portrait with Mommy)

    (Bainbridge Island with Jeff Waters + Tiffany Helms)

    (self portrait at Quinn’s in Tacoma)

    (self portrait in Joshua Tree)

    (Joshua Tree with Moss Von Faustenberg)

    (Joshua Tree with Moss Von Faustenberg)

    (Joshua Tree with Ellin Aldana)

    (Kara Perry photographs Embodoe wearing WhiskeyDog Wares doubled with a roll I took in Wyoming + NC)

    (Kara Perry photographs Tatyebar wearing WhiskeyDog Wares doubled with a roll I took in Yellowstone)

    (Dawn Iler / Coconutdreamin double exposed with Glacier National Park)

    (me photographed by Dawn Iler / Coconutdreamin)

    (self portrait in Nevada)

    (self portrait in Utah)

    (self portrait in Utah)

    (self portrait in Utah)

    (self portrait in Utah)

    (self portrait in Colorado)

    (with Lior Allay in Pittsburgh)

    (self portrait with Lior Allay + Jacs Fishburne in Columbus Ohio)

    (with Lior Allay photographed by Jacs Fishburne)

    (Nashville Tennessee with Bashing Bagpipes)

    (Nashville Tennessee with Chris Widick)

    (self portrait in North Carolina)

    (self portrait in North Carolina)

    (with Mike Tyger in an abandoned house in North Carolina)

    (self portrait from 2010!!! BABY BUNNY! I was about 20 years old)

    MEMBERS ONLY NUDE GATHERING SIGN UP FREE HERE

    (password: BLMBR)

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  • Olympia with Mandy Darling

    February 22, 2021 /

     

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! This is the second to last week of these weekly posts! Holy cow! It’s already like… wow February is flying. This week I’ll be sharing a photoset that’s kinda like a mixed photoset of several mediums. I think it’s digital, 35mm, medium format, and polaroid, I think? from Mandy Darling photographing me when I was in Olympia during my cross country road trip in 2019. Yeah I told you I have a whole lot from that trip I’m still posting, and this is not all of it, you’re gonna see a lot more when I do that mass upload in March. But for now, here’s a bunch of photos that Mandy Darling took of me, this was outside of her parent’s house in Olympia I believe? It was her parent’s house, it was a really beautiful place full of gardens and surrounded by woods and it was beautiful. I had a really great time so I hope you enjoy these photos. I don’t have BTS video, but the video from this week I’m sharing is actually a pretty fun video that I made in the spring of 2020. It’s multiple videos, I think it’s like 8 videos. In the spring of 2020 I took a walk in the woods that are behind my house to go to the ponds that are in my neighborhood, there’s a couple of little secret ponds hidden in the woods so it was me taking a walk in the woods and bringing you with me. Some of my favorite parts of this video are when I see little tiny frogs in the grass, there were so many tiny frogs this spring, it was so cute, I’m really excited to see them again. I think there’s a couple of moments when I’m searching for frogs and you can see how cute and tiny they are. So yeah just hanging out in the woods and taking you with me so I hope you enjoy that.

    First look people, I will be sharing the double exposures that I took of Lior Allay during the Backstage Pass event for Going Beyond the Lens that was in December of 2020. It was so great, they were so amazing. I did doubles of them during this event and people that were at the event helped… what’s the word? helped direct Lior for some of the poses. So the last I think 6 poses of theirs that you see were directed by people that were at the event, so that was super fun and exciting, I really loved it. It was really enjoyable to create together as a group. I had never experienced anything like that and it was amazing. These doubles were taken with the photos of Bryce Canyon that I took during my cross country road trip. I hope you enjoy all of those.

    If you are new here I’ll give you a recap of what is happening very soon. February I’ll do weekly posts like this through the end of February, so after this week there’s one more week of these weekly posts, and then starting in March I’ll be doing monthly members-only hangout gathering virtual live “in person” events, and you’ll also be able to get free admission to some of the paid events that I’ll be participating in or leading that are outside of just members only, they’re also for the public but they have to pay, but members will get to be in there for free. That and I will be in March also mass uploading everything from first look and my backlog which first look hasn’t even seen yet because I have so much content. I’m a little nervous about it because it’s a big change, I’ve been doing for the most part ish, weekly posts like this, since 2016 or 2017, so this is a big major change. I’m really excited about it because it’s going to allow me to have more time to create more free resources for everyone and to have more community experiences, which I’m much more interested in, where I’m in a community where we co-facilitate/cocreate an event together versus right now where I’m just like talking AT you and giving you access to stuff. That’s not as connecting for me, and I’m exited to get to know yall a little better and just…. nurture community. I think we all need community, especially during covid. If you have any questions please let me know, you can comment on this post, you can send me an email, you can contact me in another way if you want. Yeah I’m excited even though I’m scared. A lot will be changing, but I’m looking forward to seeing where this is going to go, because instead of talking AT you, I’ll be talking WITH you and that is more exciting to me. I’m starting off with one members-only event per month starting in March because I don’t want to overwhelm myself with too many things because I’ll most likely be doing 2 events per month for Going Beyond the Lens.

    Speaking of, I think by the time this comes out the event is already happening, I think? Oh I can’t look at my calendar because it’s on my phone and I’m recording on my phone! Oh I have a paper calendar too. Yeah so when this comes out it’s going to be on the 20th and the art share is on the 20th, so when this comes out you have a few hours left to sign up for the art share which is FREE! (CLICK HERE TO REGISTER) It’s going to happen at 1pm eastern time, so you have a little bit of time if you haven’t signed up yet, we would love to have you join us, whether or not you share your art with us. That’s through Going Beyond the Lens, I’ll put a link if you’d like more information (CLICK HERE FOR INFO), it’s the collective that I’m a cofounder of. What else? I think that’s all for this week. Change is scary but I’m excited and super thankful for you for being here with me through it. Yeah you mean so much to me and I’m so excited to have more opportunity to grow with you, so thank you. I love you! *blows kiss*

    All members:
    click here to view the 69 image photoset taken by Mandy Darling in Olympia Washington during my cross country road trip summer 2019
    click here to view the 8 videos of me taking you on a walk through the woods from spring 2020
    Click here for access to my archive of 12,500+ photos & 2,000+ videos
    Click here for the passwords, they change the 1st of every month

    First Look/All Access members:
    click here to view the 38 image photoset of Lior Allay doubled with Bryce Canyon National Park during the Backstage Pass event for Going Beyond the Lens with Roarie Yum
    click here to view 31 BTS photos/videos

    Not a member? Click here to sign up for instant access!

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  • Self Portraits in Utah – Among Goblins

    February 13, 2021 /

     

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! Welcome to the.. what is it? Third to last week of these weekly posts like this, whaaat? So this week I’m sharing another photoset from my cross country road trip in the summer of 2019 because I have to much to share from that. I’m not even going to be sharing them weekly like this. I have so many that they won’t fit into the last weeks of February so you’ll get most of them when I mass upload them in March. It’s going to be a lot, a whole lot.

    So this week, are photos, I think it’s over 100 photos, self portraits that I took in Goblin Valley, very exciting, I really like them, I hope you do too. I have BTS videos for these photos also. First look is getting access to the self portrait photoset that I took at my friend Quinn Sanguine‘s house in Tacoma Washington, also during my cross country road trip in the summer of 2019. These I took in Quinn’s bedroom, they had a cool setup with lights on their wall, it was really cute and I really like the orange tone in their room, so I took advantage and took a bunch of self portraits while I was there. So that’s it for what’s new this week.

     To recap the changes that will be happening soon. February is the last month I’ll be doing weekly posts like this. In March I will be mass-uploading everything from my backlog and first look galleries, which is a WHOLE lot, a whole whole lot. So I’m not sure exactly when I’ll be dropping that mass upload, but that will be coming in March hopefully. Also in March start doing at least once a month members-only video hangouts so we can be together live “in person” virtually. I’m starting off with once a month because I don’t want to overwhelm myself with too many things all the time, which is another reason why I am not pressuring myself to do these weekly posts, not pressuring myself to create work constantly because as you know, if you’ve been here for any amount of time, I created like 4 or 5 photosets in the entirety of 2020. I know that my work, it’s not conducive to pressure and the requirement of “oh I have to do this thing right now” that just means I’m going to create something that doesn’t have intention and thought and real creativity behind it if I’m  stressed about it and feeling like “oh I have to make something right now” then it’s just going to be something I made because I felt like I needed to. That doesn’t do justice to me as an artist and it doesn’t do justice to you as a member of my website enjoying my art, because if it’s something I feel like I have to do that I rush through then the quality of it is diminished and it’s just not as good. I’m committed to doing things in the timing that works for me, which is not going to necessarily be consistent. So yeah I hope that you also give yourself grace in that way if you’re able to if you’re a creator.

    What else is new that I’m forgetting? By the time this comes out the EcoLove Playshop will have already happened, but you still have time to sign up for the Art Share for Going Beyond the Lens which is the 3rd Saturday of every month. I’m very excited to see your art. What else? Yeah so while I’m in this transitionary phase, I’m keeping things to a simplistic, minimalistic, sense thing… just to make sure that I’m not overwhelming myself, because I want to provide yall with quality  content and quality time with me. Just because it’s not weekly like it has been in the past, I know that I’m going to be doing my best and still offering yall quality art and time with me. So yeah my archive will be available for all members and will be a lot bigger than it was, very soon in March. Like there’s SO MUCH in first look alone that it’s going to take a while to do the mass upload but I’m excited because yall are going to be in for a huge treat, with all this content. It is really scary to make changes like this and to make a leap of faith with myself and make changes in what I’m doing but I feel much more excited and… what’s the word? Maybe rejuvenated by the potential of what this could be. Right now at this point it feels like I’m talking AT you and just like “here have photos, here have videos” and while I super love all my photos and videos, it doesn’t feel like we’re connecting with each other. It feels like I’m providing content and you’re consuming it, and I would really like to start being in a community space with you instead of like “here you go!” Now it will be more like “lets hang out together and get to know each other and share our art or whatever” so yeah I’m excited for these changes even though it’s scary.

    Okay uhm yeah if you have any questions comments concerns ideas whatever, comment on this post or email me or however you feel like contacting me, I would love to hear from you. I wonder if doing a 2-part content drop would be better than doing it all at once. I’ll think about it. Or you can let me know what you think! Ok I love you, thank you for being here, I appreciate that you are going on this journey of change and exploration and figuring shit out with me, it means a lot! I’m excited to go on this exploration with you and to get to know myself better and to get to know you better, and to have fun. I love you! Bye!

    All members:
    click here to view the 106 image self portrait photoset Among Goblins in Utah
    click here to view the 13.5 minutes of BTS video
    Click here for access to my archive of 12,500+ photos & 2,000+ videos
    Click here for the passwords, they change the 1st of every month

    First Look/All Access members:
    click here to view the 50 image self portrait photoset I took at Quinn Sanguine‘s in Tacoma Washington

    Not a member? Click here to sign up for instant access!

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  • Self portraits in Utah – Between

    January 9, 2021 /

     

    CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hey friends, I have been having a rough week and I assume many of you probably have been too with all of the bullshit that’s going on in the world right now, so I’m going to try to keep this short.

    This week I’m sharing a self portrait set that I took in Utah summer of 2019. I still have a lot of self portrait sets from that trip to share with you so continue to look for that in the future, I have a lot still. This photoset I took, it was actually basically behind where my camping space was. I had a campsite and behind it was this little mini canyon that was totally private to my campsite, so that was incredible and of course I took advantage of that and took a bunch of self portraits back in that little canyon, so this is one of the self portraits sets from that. I’m also sharing behind the scenes video from this self portrait set.

     First look people, I’m sharing some photos that were taken with Tiffany Helms and her partner Jeff Waters. We went to this abandoned place on Bainbridge Island and it was very cool and took some photos there and it was super fun, so that’s going to First Look this week. I think there’s photos and videos.

    Uhm.. anybody that’s new, if you haven’t been here very long on my website. If you scroll back to past vlogs, like every Saturday I come out with this. If you scroll back to past ones you’ll see that I have been working towards shifting to something different with my website, and I’m still figuring out exactly what that is but I feel like I’m getting closer. I know I want to focus more on community building and live online virtual hangout type things, and have less of a focus on photography, so yeah still figuring that out. I am open to any requests, questions, comments, things like that, so if you have something to say in regards to that please comment, I would love to hear it.

    Yeah, I’m gonna keep this short and sweet, I hope you enjoy these photos, I love you so much, thank you for being here, and I’ll talk to you next week.

    All members:
    click here to view the 37 image self portrait photoset in Utah
    click here to view the 2.5 minute BTS video
    Click here for access to my archive of 12,500+ photos & 2,000+ videos
    Click here for the passwords, they change the 1st of every month

    First Look/All Access members:
    click here to view the 11 image photoset of me (+ some with Tiffany Helms) taken by Jeff Waters
    click here to view 18.5 minutes of BTS video

    Not a member? Click here to sign up for instant access!

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  • Doubles with Tiffany Helms

    September 5, 2020 /

    CAPTION FOR VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello good morning! Well, morning for you when you see this maybe, it’s not really morning here anymore. I’m really excited about this photoset that I’m sharing with you this week. I took it on my cross country road trip last year like most of the other sets I’ve been sharing recently and will continue to share because I took SO MUCH last year. I have a huge backlog and I’m really glad because I haven’t really made much this year at all and it’s already September.

    This photoset that I took last year on my cross country road trip is of a model that I’ve worked with 2 or 3 times before, Tiffany Helms, who is super awesome. I shared a photoset with yall recently of single exposures I took of her, and these are the double exposures that I took. Of course I’m really excited about them because doubles. We took these on Bainbridge Island where she lives outside of Seattle. What all do I want to say about this set? The singles that we took, we took before we took these doubles. We took all the doubles at a second location. The first location was that really cool abandoned spot that I shared with yall recently. This other location wasn’t super far away but we did drive to get to the trailhead for it. It was pretty awesome because there were like… what were they called? There was wild… food of some kind that I’m having trouble… was it blackberries? Was it… NO it was wild cherries! There were wild cherries on the trail that we were snacking on that was so awesome and it was great. On the way to this place where we shot. I don’t exactly know what part of the island we were on? I didn’t.. I wasn’t the driver during this shoot. Tiffany’s partner Jeff Waters was the driver for us and our assistant/lookout. We went to this place that was right next to the water and there was another abandoned building that was different than the abandoned building we previously had been to. We didn’t shoot inside of it but we shot next to and around it. I was most excited about the water and the beachy area because it looked beautiful so we have a lot of photos from that place. I hope my neighbor doing their grass isn’t too loud. I’m gonna get closer so you can hear me better. So yeah it was super fun, I had a good time. Oh yay maybe they’re done! Yeah… it was super awesome. I did the doubles a little bit differently than I usually do… or recently have done. Usually I’ll shoot a whole roll (I mean I kinda did it the same way, but) rewind it, and shoot over it again. Usually the first set of images is all just background images like landscapes and the second set of images I shoot are usually with the model. For these photos I was pretty excited with what we were creating and I actually shot a whole roll of Tiffany, portrait, like closer up mostly of her face. Then I rewound the roll and shot over it all over again with further away, with her more in the landscape. I think they turned out super amazing and I’m very excited about how they look.

    I usually did that kind of double where I would double the person in there twice, I usually did that with my medium format camera in the past. I’ve been having some technical issues with that camera for over a year and it’s discouraged me and I haven’t really been using it because of the technical issues. I think I really just need some new batteries, but it takes like 4 batteries. Or 8 or 6? It takes a lot of batteries so I haven’t really shot with my medium format camera in a while. These images I took with 35mm and I haven’t done doubles this way in a long time. I’m very excited and happy with how they turned out, I think they’re incredible. Tiffany is always really easy to work with, she’s a model and photographer so she basically… just tell her your idea and she runs with it. She doesn’t ever really need much direction because she’s excellent at posing, she is one of my pose inspirations. She’s really creative and bendy and I love her funky poses that she sometimes does. I’m really happy with how these turned out. I have the whole photoset to share with you and the BTS video, so look for that! All members have access to all of that.

     The first look members I have another photoset that’s self portraits that I took in Utah last summer that I’m sharing with first look. I’m sure you’ll love them, I love them a lot. They were also taken outside of Moab outside of Canyonlands. I’m pretty sure that’s where this set was taken. Yeah, similar to the other sets I’ve shared recently, I took a lot of sets off the side of the road basically. Beacuse the whole place, Utah itself is just fucking gorgeous. The whole state basically, the parts that I’ve been to, Southern Utah, the WHOLE of Southern Utah is very photogenic as you can see in my photos. I’m excited to share all that with you.

    In terms of personal stuff recently, I’ve been working with Lior Allay and Roarie Yum on our going behind the scenes, no, going behind the le… why am I tongue tied right now? Probably because I was just on a 4.5 hour video call. GOING BEYOND THE LENS, our project community group, we’ve been working on getting ready for our next event which is Saturday the 19th at 1pm eastern if you want to join, it’ll be about BODY LANGUAGE. I’m pretty excited about this because I think I will also incorporate a little bit of energy medicine in this because it totally relates, because it’s our body. I’m excited about that, it’s something we’re working on. The invitation email went out today, which is Thursday, so if you’re on that list you’ll have already received it by the time this video is released. We’ve been talking about future plans and goals and I’m pretty excited about the stuff we’re working on. I’m so thankful that they’re working with me, both of them, because I greatly admire them and look up to them and really super appreciate all of the things that they have to offer, and the way they move about the world. I just.. they’re both incredible people and I’m so thankful to be able to work with them. It’s been a labor of love creating this community together and figuring out what works best for us and what we need to shift and update. It comes with its own challenges but it’s been incredible and I’m so thankful for everything we’ve been able to do so far and I’m very excited for what will come in the future. We have lots of ideas and I know that time will be needed in order to get to all the things we wanna do. I’m just… we have big plans and dreams and I’m so excited to share it with yall whenever those things actually happen. For now you can join us basically every month for a free event.

    Body language on Saturday the 19th! Please join us! I’ll put a link down here! CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR THE FREE EVENT!

    That’s all I have to say for today. As you can tell I’m in a better mood right now than I probably was in the last couple videos. I’ve been doing energy medicine yoga pretty much every day for over a week and it has helped tremendously with my feels, my emotions, my stress. I think your September nude yoga video, I think it’s gonna be EM yoga, energy medicine yoga, and I think my mom will join me for it. So… look for that! Coming soon! Yeah that’s all I have to say today, this is already a 10 minute video. I love you so much! Thank you for being here! Each of you are so important to the world and I know that you all have gifts to share and I’m thankful that you’re here and paying attention to me for whatever reason you felt like doing that. It means a lot to me. I love you, thank you, and I’ll see you next week! Bye!

    Video members:
    click here to view the full double exposure photoset of Tiffany Helms on Bainbridge Island, Washington during my cross country road trip last summer
    click here to view the BTS video

    First Look members:
    click here to view the photoset self portrait photoset of me with two Mesas in Utah

    Click here for the gallery passwords

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  • Doubles with Tiffany Helms

    September 5, 2020 /

    Pay What You Can & Video members now have access to:

    • vlog with the story behind this double exposure photoset of Tiffany Helms on Bainbridge Island, Washington during my cross country road trip last summer
    • 25 image complete photoset
    • 15.5 minutes of BTS video

    First Look members now have access to:

    • everything above
    • 29 image complete self portrait photoset of me with two Mesas in Utah

    Become a member to gain instant access!

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  • Tiffany Helms in the Ruins

    August 8, 2020 /

    Video members now have access to:

    • vlog with the story behind this photoset of Tiffany Helms at an abandoned location on Bainbridge Island during my cross country road trip last summer
    • 37 image complete photoset
    • 4 BTS videos
    • 7 BTS photos

    First Look members now have access to:

    • everything above
    • 34 image complete photoset of Embodoe wearing WhiskeyDog Wares taken by Kara Perry double exposed over images I took of Wyoming and NC waterfalls
    • 8 videos (49.5+ minutes total) from a walk through the woods

    Become a member to gain instant access!

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  • Tiffany Helms in the Ruins

    August 8, 2020 /

    CAPTION FOR VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hi friends! So this week the photos that I’m sharing with you are photos that I took with Tiffany Helms, you saw a photoset I think it was 2 weeks ago that I shared with you of her. We took I think it was 3 or 4 different photosets so this is another photoset from that same day. These are the photos that we took in this ruins place that we hiked to that was really cool. I don’t exactly know what it used to be, but it was this cool place on Bainbridge Island. We parked… so we drove like 5-10 mins from her house on Bainbridge Island and parked at a parking lot for a park and walked around and went to this spot and it was awesome! We took a bunch of photos there and I actually also have some photos to share with you on another date, another time, that Tiffany’s partner Jeff Waters took of me and some of them Tiffany is also in. This is when I had really long hair and Tiffany also has long blonde hair so we looked very similar. We also are around the same size and height and stuff so that was pretty cool, I’ll share those with you later. These photos are photos I took of her in this ruins area. I think they’re super awesome and I love them and there’s this huge cool tree and it was just fun exploring this place so I’m excited to share those with you. There’s some BTS video and stuff too.

    I think… I think this week the first look stuff that I’m sharing is a photoset that was taken by Kara Perry of Embodoe (on instagram) with a roll of my images from my trip last summer, double exposures, so I took this roll of landscapes and Kara double exposed over it with her friend Embodoe, I think her name is Emily? But her IG name is Embodoe so that’s the name I’m going to be using especially since I’m going to be tagging her in this so you can go to her page and look at all the things. I think these photos are super awesome. Embodoe was wearing lingerie that was handmade here in NC by WhiskeyDog Wares so if you need some handmade underwear things or lingerie, totally check WhiskeyDog Wares out, her stuff is amazing. There’s also a couple other photosets that Kara took with my landscape film, double exposures that she took of other models wearing WhiskeyDog Wares that I’ll be sharing with you in the future also. They’re super awesome. I love Kara, I love WhiskeyDog Wares, I’m really excited that they were using some of my film for that.

    What else do I want to share with you? I’ve had a weird couple of days, the full moon on Monday… I don’t know, has me feeling kinda weird. I’ve felt very stuck this week and like I want to just sit around and not do anything. I’m going to sit down. Yeah I’ve felt stuck this week, I’ve felt like I don’t know what direction I want to go in, I don’t know what my goals are. It’s been great to slow down on the live things online so I can recalibrate and figure out where I want my time to go. Yeah I’m still figuring that out. I don’t know where I want my time to go. I’ve been working on a special secret project with Lior and Roarie this week. I don’t want to talk to much about it in case things… you know… but, enough about that. Conscious Creativity was INCREDIBLE and exceeded my expectations. That was last weekend on Saturday. If you joined us I am so thankful that you did, and I would love to hear from you on how it went for you and what your thoughts are on it, what you liked, what you didn’t like, what you’d like to see more of, anything you’d like to change. I had an incredible time, we planned it for 2 hours and it ended up being 3. I was blown away with all of the vulnerable sharing that everyone did and the discussion that we had and the valuable conversation and empathy that we had with each other. The way that we… everyone was so respectful of each other and valued each other as humans and it was so wonderful and I super loved all of the movement things we did together. I think that was a really fun way to connect online even though we’re not in person, still being in our bodies is great and it’s something that I want to continue doing.

    I’m not sure what’s coming up for the future still, I probably will never know, but I’m glad that I have the time and space now to really feel into what works for me. At this point I don’t know what that is yet, but I have the time and space to figure that out. I’m thankful for yall for being here with me. If you have anything that you’d like to contribute in terms of ideas or recommendations or comments about how I run this website, about how I show up online. I’m definitely really open to that. I value your input and I value your thoughts and preferences and I definitely want to consider that in the things that I do. I really appreciate all of you for being here with me and for continuing to show up every week and for supporting me and for enjoying the work that I put out. I really don’t know what’s next, I really don’t. I definitely want to do more events, more workshops, more group things. Obviously online is accessible and offline in person is a little out of reach at the moment with the state of the world, but I would really like to in the future open it back up to in person events again, because those are so transformative and incredible and I get so much out of those and I know that the people who participate in in person events really get a lot out of them too. So yeah, if you have anything to share with me about your experience here on my website as a member, your experience as a participant in any of the events I’ve put on, I’d love to hear what you have to say. If you have any ideas that you’d love to see from me, let me know. I do plan on doing more video content, I don’t know exactly what that means yet. I think I’d really like to make some mediation and relaxation kindof videos. I have a lot of nature video content that I could use for relaxing ASMR nature meditation chill video things, which is what I’m kinda thinking about recently. Yeah I’d love to have your feedback. I love you, thank you for being on this journey with me, and I’ll talk to you next week. =]

    Video members:
    click here to view the full photoset of Tiffany Helms at an abandoned location on Bainbridge Island during my cross country road trip last summer
    click here to view the BTS video + photos

    First Look members:
    click here to view the photoset of Embodoe wearing WhiskeyDog Wares taken by Kara Perry double exposed over images I took of Wyoming and NC waterfalls
    click here to view the videos from a walk through the woods

    Click here for the gallery passwords

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  • Washington Forest Riverside with Pure Rebel

    August 1, 2020 /

    CAPTION FOR VIDEO ABOVE:

    Hello! We had a really big storm last night and it rained over 3 inches overnight, so a lot of the plants have been having a hard time and they’re all falling over. Poor plants. I think everything is still kinda moist. Okay, so this weekend I’m sharing with you a photoset, actually it’s 2 photosets from when I was creating with Kristy Jessica aka Pure Rebel last summer outside of Seattle we went to a waterfall in Washington and it was gorgeous! We hiked around to the actual waterfall part and there were too many people around and we just couldn’t find a good spot to shoot so we went back and down the river/creek area a little bit, down the path, and found a spot next to the water with these huge rocks and trees and it was gorgeous so we shot there. We didn’t even shoot at the official waterfall. I shot some photos of her and she shot some photos of me and it was awesome! I was also frustrated with myself because I didn’t realize it until we were at the place ready to shoot and had already hiked up the little mountain trail… that I left my film in my van. So instead of trekking back to my van and then back to the spot, I just shot digitals of her. This was well over a month into my trip and I was starting to… I don’t know be… I guess a little more tired and out of it or something. I was frustrated with myself that I forgot my film so… I think this is actually, with the exception of the photos I took of Ravyn that were digital just because she wanted some content to be able to share sooner than the film… this was the only photoset I took that was digital that I don’t have any film photos of her. Yeah, so I was frustrated and disappointed in myself that I forgot my film, but the digitals still came out really amazing and Kristy is an incredible model so I’m really excited that we got to do that.

    I have some BTS video of her shooting me, I don’t have BTS of me shooting her because I was using my digital camera to shoot her and I can’t do both things with my camera at once. The first look people, I’m sharing some photos from Chris Widick in Nashville that he took of me with strawberries last summer before my trip. They’re awesome, I love these photos. I have a lot of cool new things to share with you.

    I don’t have a lot of new things to share right now, by the time you watch this video it’ll be Saturday, and it’ll be very close to the event that Lior and Doug and Crossing Hedgerows are going to be co-hosting with me, Conscious Creativity 2020. We did CC last year outside of Detroit Michigan in person at Crossing Hedgerows Sanctuary which is a permaculture farm, but of course because of covid we aren’t able to do an in person event this year so we’re taking it online and I’m very excited. This usually posts at about 8am, there’s still time to sign up and join us because the event is at 1pm eastern, so if you see this video and you’re like “oh I didn’t know, let’s do this” you can still sign up, it’s at the link in my bio on IG, I think I posted about it last week too, I’ll put a link in the comments (CLICK HERE TO JOIN US FOR FREE). You won’t have a whole lot of time to sign up because it’s at 1pm but it’s FREE so please join us, we would love it! Also I’ve been doing some IG lives with Lior and Doug, I did an IG live with Lior on Wednesday and I’ll be doing one on Friday with Doug, and those are just to give you a little bit more of a preview of what to expect during the event so If you want more info you can go to IG and look at those.

    What else do I want to share today? I’m doing this early again this week because tomorrow, which is Thursday for me right now, is usually the day that I do these but I will be helping my friend move, so I’m doing this a day early. Also I don’t know if you’ve noticed, my face is real mad at me. All the skin around my lips is real chapped, that’s because I’ve been making out a lot and my face is like “what are you doing?” Yeah my skin is so sensitive when I make out a lot it freaks out and gets real dry. But it also doesn’t help that I’m making out with somebody with a beard. Does this happen to you? Do you get like… really chapped around your face around your mouth when you make out with somebody? Because I do. If you do you’re not alone because look at my face. I feel like it looks ridiculous but I’m just.. you know, there’s nothing I can do about it I can just keep putting stuff on it to help it heal. And also I do not regret making out, because making out is fun.

    Yeah I don’t have much else to share today and I want to get a lot of stuff done so this is your video for this week. I love you! Thank you for being here, I appreciate you so much! One day I’ll figure out other things that I want to do with all of this but for now I’m just taking it one step at a time. I love you, thank you, I’ll talk to you next week, bye!

    Video members:
    click here to view the full photoset of Pure Rebel taken in Washington state during my cross country road trip last summer
    click here to view the full photoset she took of me
    click here to view the BTS video

    First Look members:
    click here to view the photoset taken by Chris Widick in Nashville TN
    click here to view the video interview with my parents about our unique relationship
    click here to view the video interview with my parents & my aunt about their parents and how they grew up

    Click here for the gallery passwords

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