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Doubles with Eva Luna & KH
CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:
Hi friends! Ok so I am excited because I feel better since I have more of a plan for what I want to do with my website. We are officially into February which means it’s our last month of the weekly things like this. I’m excited so here we go!
This week I’m sharing double exposures that I took of Eva Luna & KH from my cross country road trip in 2019 at that nude beach that I’ve already told yall about a couple of times because I’ve shared.. I think this is the last thing I have to share from that day with them. These are the double exposures that I took of them. The landscapes are from Sequoia and Kings Canyon National Parks from earlier in that same trip when I was in California. I think they’re super beautiful, I really love how they came out. There’s also behind the scenes video for this photoset, so yay!
And then first look folks, I’m sharing the double exposures… this is a whole double exposure week. I’m sharing the double exposures that I took of Dawn, also known as coconutdreamin in the past. They’re so dreamy. The doubles…. I think it was last week, I shared me posing for Dawn, and this week it’s Dawn posing for me for the doubles so it was in the same place. I have BTS of this as well. The doubles, the landscape part of the doubles is from Glacier National Park in Montana from my cross country road trip, and the photos of Dawn I took in my house in NC, in… I’m pretty sure it was November or December of 2019. Dawn cut their hair also recently, so this before Dawn cut their hair, but Dawn has short hair now also, pretty exciting. Yeah so I don’t want to make this super long because my plan is to make some of these videos early so that I can get ahead so I can plan more exciting things for yall, and also so that I can get a head start on the mass upload of everything once March rolls around, so excited for that.
If you’re new here and you haven’t seen the past blogs that I’ve done in the last month, I’m doing an overhaul of my website and February is the last month of these weekly posts like this. In March I’ll be mass uploading everything from my backlog and all the things from First Look will be available for everybody. I’m also I think going to make one membership tier and it’s just going to be sliding scale, that’s what I’m thinking about doing because I feel like, just makes the most sense, it’s the most simple, and it also means that everything is accessible to everybody and you pay what you’re able to pay. I’ll have more information on that soon, I’ll be rebuilding my membership page, rebuilding my whole website yay! Not really excited about that because also how do I brand?! So yeah that’s something I’m thinking about a lot is like, do I wanna do branding for my website? How do I do that? What do I want my colors to be? What do I want my fonts to be? What do I want to emphasize? So right now I’m really focusing on I think… you might be excited for this, because I think most people that come to my website are most intrigued by nude gatherings, which… I am excited to tell you… I don’t have any official plans yet but my plan is to make a plan for virtual nude gatherings! So yay! That’s really exciting to me. So yeah I want to focus on virtual hangout things, nude and non nude, like educational opportunities where I share the knowledge that I have and you also share the knowledge that you have because I’m not a guru that knows everything. I know a little bit about a lot of things so I want to share knowledge, not just dispense it. I want to.. what’s the word. I want to circulate it around, I want to facilitate the sharing of knowledge, not like “I hold all of it and you have to be a certain way in order for me to share it with you” no. So I’m excited about all of that, the potential for all of these changes is pretty exciting, while it’s also scary at the same time. You know, life changes are scary but also exciting.
So yeah…. I’m going to do a quick recap of my plans, even though I’ve kinda been doing a recap of my plans here already. Weekly posts will continue as they have been through February and then will be no more. I will hopefully in March mass upload all of my backlog and first look into the galleries for everyone. I’ll be redoing my website, restructuring my memberships. If you’re already a member this won’t affect you, because everything will stay the same for you basically, you’ll just be most likely having more access to more content because it’s in my backlog right now that you’ll be getting in March, hopefully. March is the plan. Starting hopefully in March I’ll be doing at least one monthly members-only video virtual hangout community gathering thing. I probably will have themes or topics for us to talk about. I would like to have some kind of structure around it but I don’t want to just be talking AT you the whole time, I want to have a conversation between us.
I will be, OH! I haven’t told yall this yet. Or… I might post about it before this comes out. On February 12th, it’s a Friday, I will be… what’s the word… a special guest maybe? I will be helping with a, they’re calling it a playshop, which is exciting. I’ll be a part of a playshop called EcoLove Playshop that is hosted by Lior Allay & Jenna Citrus. I’m very excited because it’s centered around loving ourselves and loving the earth and coming together as a community to do those things, so I’m really excited about that. I’ll put the link in the caption below so you can sign up. (SIGN UP HERE!) If you’re not a member of my website it’s $11 to register, but as a member, you get to join for free! So I’ll share with you the code to get in for free instead of having to pay for it, so yay, another perk to being a member, is events like that that are pay to register, you’ll get to register for free! (EDIT: You must be a member of mine, Lior’s, and Jenna’s sites to receive a free ticket.) I’m really excited, I think it’s going to be really beautiful. I’ve already sent Lior my two cents to share in the slideshow, and I’ll lead a short energy practice for us. I believe I’ll be at the beginning of the playshop, so I’m excited to do a little thing at the beginning and then experience it with you, yay.
What else? On the third Saturday of every month is going to be the Art Share through Going Beyond the Lens. That’s going to continually happen. Those are free, whether you’re a member or not those are free for everybody. I’m excited about that. If you have art you’d like to share with us, I’ll share the signup info below also! (REGISTER HERE!) There’s a recurring eventbrite for that through May I believe, is what we have it scheduled through, so far. The plan is to do it every month, we have the recurring event go through May for now. Yeah! I’m excited! I hope you are too.
It means a WHOLE lot that you’re here in the first place, at all. I really appreciate that you’re here through these changes and updates and… me trying to figure out what I’m doing. It means a lot, so thank you. Yeah… I hope you have a wonderful day and I hope you enjoy these double exposures, I really love them and I hope you do too. *blows kiss*
All members:
click here to view the 36 image double exposure photoset of Eva Luna & KH with Sequoia & Kings Canyon National Parks
click here to view the 15.5 minute BTS video
Click here for access to my archive of 12,500+ photos & 2,000+ videos
Click here for the passwords, they change the 1st of every monthFirst Look/All Access members:
click here to view the 37 image double exposure photoset of Dawn Iler aka coconutdreamin with Glacier National Park
click here to view 16.5 minutes of BTS video -
KH photographs Eva Luna & me at a nude beach
CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:
Hi friends! This week I’m sharing a photoset that was taken by KH of me & Eva Luna when we were all in Portland in the summer of 2019. I also have BTS video and BTS pictures to share with you, so all of that is now in the galleries. This is the same place as the photoset I shared with you of them recently, the nude beach, which is awesome. I highly recommend going to nude beaches as much as possible for anyone, because they’re fun and also I love to be naked outside. It feels really safe to be at a place where they expect you to be nude. So that’s my favorite thing, is being in places where I don’t have to sneak around and be nude and I can just do it because it’s a normal thing. Hence probably why I’m at home a lot because I can be nude in my back yard with no negative repercussions or whatever.
First look people… I’m sharing the photos I took, and I think I have video too, from when I had the last nude gathering that I was able to have before covid hit. This was in.. I think it was August or September of 2019. I didn’t know that this was going to be my last nude gathering, but this one I did at my house, here, in the living room, that way. We had people over and we took a bunch of pictures and these are the things that I created, but I also have photosets to share with you in the future that were taken by the participants. Two… yeah two or three of the people that participated also took some pictures, so I’ll share those with yall at a later week. But yeah so… I hope you enjoy them. You probably, I mean you most likely have already seen *points behind me* this picture, because I love it and it’s all over the place and I’ve posted it in a lot of places and I have a big print of it in my house next to my bed in my room *points behind me*, that’s from the nude gathering here in the summer of 2019. Yeah so… more from where that came from for first look.
I don’t want to make this too long because I have other things I’d like to do today, but I also realize that I kindof haven’t been putting a lot of effort into these weekly posts as of… recently. Probably because I feel like I’m kindof just like… following the template that I created months ago and it’s not really fun and exciting. There isn’t really much of a purpose behind it other than like “here I’m sharing photos with you. Here I’m sharing videos with you.” I think that’s part of why I want to make changes to my website overall because it’s not um…. there’s nothing wrong with paying me money so you can see nude photos, but it doesn’t really feel very fulfilling to me anymore, and also I’m barely creating any nude work anymore. While nude work will probably be in my future forever at some point, it probably will not be as frequent as it was in the past and I want to focus on other things like building community and actually spending time live with people, doing online events. Which I’ve started doing some of those with Going Beyond the Lens. I want to do some more that are just me and whoever wants to join, through my website and also do free ones for people. I’m still figuring out what all that means and how I want to incorporate memberships and what do I want to do for free, what do I want to have behind a paywall…. because I do have bills that I have to pay and I can’t do everything for free. I also really want to have my content, whatever it ends up being, I want it to be accessible to people, and money is definitely a barrier for a lot of people, so I want to find a good balance where I can still live and sustain myself but I’m also able to offer a lot of free or discounted things for people. So yeah I’m still figuring out what I want to do, I’ve been talking about this for months. I think I’m getting a little closer to figuring out what I want to do. I do have a backlog still, there’s still probably still at least maybe 2 or 3, maybe more months of content that I haven’t shared with yall that are still in my backlog that I could continue sharing on a weekly basis. I’m also kinda considering taking all of it and dumping all of it into the galleries and being like “here it is, enjoy” and maybe making some kind of different, like I don’t know, memes, or some kind of different video, not just a vlog but “this is something I’ve learned and maybe you’d like to know about it too” or “here’s a day in the life” or… I don’t know, what do yall wanna see from me?
I’m thinking of maybe doing something along the lines of a weekly video or a monthly online hangout focused on some kind of topic that we can discuss, or like “lets meditate together, let’s do some energy together, let’s move our bodies together”. Also I know the nude gatherings have been something that people have been really drawn to, even though I’ve basically cancelled all of them for the foreseeable future because of covid, but I’m considering maybe doing them online in some fashion? So that might be something that I offer for members? I’m not sure, because I feel like, currently, the way I have my website set up, it’s mostly like cishet dudes that are here to see me naked, and that’s not a bad thing, it’s just not really like, what I want anymore. I’m hoping to make a… build a community, build a space for community for queer folks and trans folks and people who are questioning and people who want to connect to themselves more, people who maybe want to learn some coping skills for like, how to not be depressed all the time. I mean, I might not be the best person to talk about this because I’m definitely depressed. I think part of it is my feeling like I don’t have a purpose. Part of it is probably also feeling like I’ve already met a lot of goals that I used to have and I don’t know what goals I want to have for the future, so I feel like that’s part of my purposelessness feeling? These are just some thoughts, I’m rambling now, but giving you kindof an idea of the things I’m thinking about in terms of changing my website. I want to do a complete overhaul, like I want to redo my whole website, like change the banner, change the menu, change the things I have available for you to look at on my website, change what I’m offering, change the types of things that I’m selling, change the way that I interact on here, because right now it’s just like “pay me money, see my nudes” and I want more than that. I want community, I want queer people, I want a space for me to learn and grow and yall learn and grow with me. I want to not be seen as the expert, I want to be seen as someone who’s on a journey with you, of exploration and curiosity. I don’t want to be like “the boss” or the leader all the time, maybe I can facilitate the space, but I’m not the only person who has interesting things to say. I’m not the only person who has ideas of ways that the world could be better. I’m sure all of you have ideas also and have important interesting things to say. So I’m… maybe getting closer to figuring things out, but I still don’t know what the fuck I’m doing and that’s okay. You gotta be in a place of not knowing before you can be in a place of knowing, right? Yeah okay this has been almost 11 minutes now and I think I’ve said everything. I love you, thank you for being here and I’ll talk to you next week!
All members:
click here to view the 144 image photoset of me & Eva Luna taken by KH at a nude beach
click here to view the 66 BTS photos I took that day
click here to view the 16 minutes of BTS video
Click here for access to my archive of 12,500+ photos & 2,000+ videos
Click here for the passwords, they change the 1st of every monthFirst Look/All Access members:
click here to view the 56 image digital photoset I took during the nude gathering I facilitated at my home here in Charlotte (with Leopold model, Canischromatis, Nova Amour, & 2 anonymous models)
click here to view the 37 image double exposure photoset
click here to view 45 minutes of BTS video -
FREE ARCHIVED BLOG & PHOTOSET
I originally wrote this for Patreon on June 17th 2017. I no longer use Patreon and have replaced it with my website (here) but thought I would share some of my old blogs with you for FREE to show my appreciation for you visiting my website! <3
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This shoot is thanks to you, my lovely members who helped me reach my last goal. Because of you I was able to hire a model and begin donating $25/month to the National Park Foundation! <3 <3 <3 You probably remember a couple months ago when I worked with Quinn Sanguine for the first time. They came back through NC one more time before making a 3 month road trip/tour ending in Tacoma Washington, their new home. I knew I probably wouldn’t see them again for a while since they’re on the road for so long and then will be on the other side of the country. I’m really grateful that they came back through and y’all made it possible for me to hire them for a shoot. Thank you!!
We met in the evening at my parent’s place. What can I say, I shoot there all the time but I love it there and they get such good light through the giant window in their living room onto their beautiful wood floor! I previously prepared a roll of film for doubles and had the nature backgrounds ready to go on some 35mm for this shoot. We took dual self portraits! You can see the cord for my cable release in some of the photos. I’ve only taken film self portraits either by myself or with Antisocialdisposition so it was really wonderful to experiment with another model. I had this other idea using blue thread to represent the connection between everyone but as you can see in the BTS timelapse, it was such a huge tangled mess so we didn’t use it for that many photos. I’ll have to cut some of the knots out of it and experiment with it again. After we shot the dual self portraits we took some Instax and boomerangs out in the back yard.
We went out for dinner afterward and talked for a couple hours at a pizza place a couple minutes from the house. They have great insight, experience, and advice about polyam relationships, which is very much something that has been on my (and AD’s) mind a lot lately. I’m sure sure if I’m ready to share a lot about this here yet but I’ll just say that it feels like everything happens for a reason and I’m really glad we had the time to talk after our shoot because they gave me a lot to think about, in a good way.
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Check out the videos folder for a behind the scenes timelapse of our shoot AND 16 fun boomerangs that we made together!
ALSO! Brand new this month, I’m doing a monthly nude yoga video and have just uploaded June’s nude yoga video (almost 9 minutes long!)!
All members have access to this complete 17 image photoset by clicking here and the videos by clicking here.
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Doubles with Tiffany Helms
CAPTION FOR VIDEO ABOVE:
Hello good morning! Well, morning for you when you see this maybe, it’s not really morning here anymore. I’m really excited about this photoset that I’m sharing with you this week. I took it on my cross country road trip last year like most of the other sets I’ve been sharing recently and will continue to share because I took SO MUCH last year. I have a huge backlog and I’m really glad because I haven’t really made much this year at all and it’s already September.
This photoset that I took last year on my cross country road trip is of a model that I’ve worked with 2 or 3 times before, Tiffany Helms, who is super awesome. I shared a photoset with yall recently of single exposures I took of her, and these are the double exposures that I took. Of course I’m really excited about them because doubles. We took these on Bainbridge Island where she lives outside of Seattle. What all do I want to say about this set? The singles that we took, we took before we took these doubles. We took all the doubles at a second location. The first location was that really cool abandoned spot that I shared with yall recently. This other location wasn’t super far away but we did drive to get to the trailhead for it. It was pretty awesome because there were like… what were they called? There was wild… food of some kind that I’m having trouble… was it blackberries? Was it… NO it was wild cherries! There were wild cherries on the trail that we were snacking on that was so awesome and it was great. On the way to this place where we shot. I don’t exactly know what part of the island we were on? I didn’t.. I wasn’t the driver during this shoot. Tiffany’s partner Jeff Waters was the driver for us and our assistant/lookout. We went to this place that was right next to the water and there was another abandoned building that was different than the abandoned building we previously had been to. We didn’t shoot inside of it but we shot next to and around it. I was most excited about the water and the beachy area because it looked beautiful so we have a lot of photos from that place. I hope my neighbor doing their grass isn’t too loud. I’m gonna get closer so you can hear me better. So yeah it was super fun, I had a good time. Oh yay maybe they’re done! Yeah… it was super awesome. I did the doubles a little bit differently than I usually do… or recently have done. Usually I’ll shoot a whole roll (I mean I kinda did it the same way, but) rewind it, and shoot over it again. Usually the first set of images is all just background images like landscapes and the second set of images I shoot are usually with the model. For these photos I was pretty excited with what we were creating and I actually shot a whole roll of Tiffany, portrait, like closer up mostly of her face. Then I rewound the roll and shot over it all over again with further away, with her more in the landscape. I think they turned out super amazing and I’m very excited about how they look.
I usually did that kind of double where I would double the person in there twice, I usually did that with my medium format camera in the past. I’ve been having some technical issues with that camera for over a year and it’s discouraged me and I haven’t really been using it because of the technical issues. I think I really just need some new batteries, but it takes like 4 batteries. Or 8 or 6? It takes a lot of batteries so I haven’t really shot with my medium format camera in a while. These images I took with 35mm and I haven’t done doubles this way in a long time. I’m very excited and happy with how they turned out, I think they’re incredible. Tiffany is always really easy to work with, she’s a model and photographer so she basically… just tell her your idea and she runs with it. She doesn’t ever really need much direction because she’s excellent at posing, she is one of my pose inspirations. She’s really creative and bendy and I love her funky poses that she sometimes does. I’m really happy with how these turned out. I have the whole photoset to share with you and the BTS video, so look for that! All members have access to all of that.
The first look members I have another photoset that’s self portraits that I took in Utah last summer that I’m sharing with first look. I’m sure you’ll love them, I love them a lot. They were also taken outside of Moab outside of Canyonlands. I’m pretty sure that’s where this set was taken. Yeah, similar to the other sets I’ve shared recently, I took a lot of sets off the side of the road basically. Beacuse the whole place, Utah itself is just fucking gorgeous. The whole state basically, the parts that I’ve been to, Southern Utah, the WHOLE of Southern Utah is very photogenic as you can see in my photos. I’m excited to share all that with you.
In terms of personal stuff recently, I’ve been working with Lior Allay and Roarie Yum on our going behind the scenes, no, going behind the le… why am I tongue tied right now? Probably because I was just on a 4.5 hour video call. GOING BEYOND THE LENS, our project community group, we’ve been working on getting ready for our next event which is Saturday the 19th at 1pm eastern if you want to join, it’ll be about BODY LANGUAGE. I’m pretty excited about this because I think I will also incorporate a little bit of energy medicine in this because it totally relates, because it’s our body. I’m excited about that, it’s something we’re working on. The invitation email went out today, which is Thursday, so if you’re on that list you’ll have already received it by the time this video is released. We’ve been talking about future plans and goals and I’m pretty excited about the stuff we’re working on. I’m so thankful that they’re working with me, both of them, because I greatly admire them and look up to them and really super appreciate all of the things that they have to offer, and the way they move about the world. I just.. they’re both incredible people and I’m so thankful to be able to work with them. It’s been a labor of love creating this community together and figuring out what works best for us and what we need to shift and update. It comes with its own challenges but it’s been incredible and I’m so thankful for everything we’ve been able to do so far and I’m very excited for what will come in the future. We have lots of ideas and I know that time will be needed in order to get to all the things we wanna do. I’m just… we have big plans and dreams and I’m so excited to share it with yall whenever those things actually happen. For now you can join us basically every month for a free event.
Body language on Saturday the 19th! Please join us! I’ll put a link down here! CLICK HERE TO SIGN UP FOR THE FREE EVENT!
That’s all I have to say for today. As you can tell I’m in a better mood right now than I probably was in the last couple videos. I’ve been doing energy medicine yoga pretty much every day for over a week and it has helped tremendously with my feels, my emotions, my stress. I think your September nude yoga video, I think it’s gonna be EM yoga, energy medicine yoga, and I think my mom will join me for it. So… look for that! Coming soon! Yeah that’s all I have to say today, this is already a 10 minute video. I love you so much! Thank you for being here! Each of you are so important to the world and I know that you all have gifts to share and I’m thankful that you’re here and paying attention to me for whatever reason you felt like doing that. It means a lot to me. I love you, thank you, and I’ll see you next week! Bye!
Video members:
click here to view the full double exposure photoset of Tiffany Helms on Bainbridge Island, Washington during my cross country road trip last summer
click here to view the BTS videoFirst Look members:
click here to view the photoset self portrait photoset of me with two Mesas in Utah -
Doubles with Tiffany Helms
Pay What You Can & Video members now have access to:
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vlog with the story behind this double exposure photoset of Tiffany Helms on Bainbridge Island, Washington during my cross country road trip last summer
- 25 image complete photoset
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15.5 minutes of BTS video
First Look members now have access to:
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everything above
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29 image complete self portrait photoset of me with two Mesas in Utah
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FREE ARCHIVED BLOG & PHOTOSET
I originally wrote this for Patreon on May 27th 2017. I no longer use Patreon and have replaced it with my website (here) but thought I would share some of my old blogs with you for FREE to show my appreciation for you visiting my website! <3
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Kristy Jessica/Pure Rebel had just gotten into town an hour or two before I picked her up. I drove us to my parents house (ok, you can probably tell I love being there and creating there) and I told her my ideas for our shoot. I had already prepped a roll of film by taking flower & nature images to double expose over. I wanted to take silhouettes to show off the doubles & the great lines and shapes I knew Kristy would create. She did some wonderful and strong yoga poses! I then got some crystals together and arranged them around her for the rest of our photos. We listened to Red Hot Chili Peppers while we shot. Afterward we walked around one of the ponds in the neighborhood before I drove her home. I enjoyed talking to her, she’s a smart, talented, and compassionate person.
It was so incredibly difficult to choose which pictures to post today! There are so many amazing ones, I hope you have the time to look through them all!
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I’ve added 2 behind the scenes timelapses from our shoot so don’t forget to check the video folder!
All members have access to this complete 36 image photoset by clicking here and the videos by clicking here.
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Formations at Dusk Self Portraits
Pay What You Can & Video members now have access to:
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vlog with the story behind this self portrait photoset I took in Utah during my cross county road trip last summer
- 37 image complete photoset
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2 minutes of BTS video
- 19 minute video talking about reparations (content warning: I speak about injustice and violence toward BIPOC)
First Look members now have access to:
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everything above
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36 image complete double exposure photoset I took of Eva Luna & KH outside of Portland
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15.5 minutes of BTS video
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Formations at Dusk Self Portraits
CAPTION FOR THE VIDEO ABOVE:
Hello, good morning. This week I’m sharing another self portrait set from Utah last summer. I have a whole lot of self portrait sets from last summer to share so this is… another one that was taken outside of Canyonlands National Park outside of Moab. It’s the road that goes to Canyonlands… it’s I mean it’s not just Canyonlands within the park that’s beautiful, it’s everything around there, so I didn’t even have to be in the park. There’s a few places to park in little parking lots on the side of the road before you get to the park. This is one of the spaces I was in, and it’s fucking gorgeous beautiful, and it was just starting to get dark so it was dusk. I have a mosquito on me, wonderful. Mosquitoes have been so bad this year. So yeah those are available for everyone to see, including the behind the scenes which is really short because I was taking all of my self portraits very quickly, you’ll see in the video, and the video is only I think 2 minutes long. And I got I think 40 or 50 self portraits in 2 minutes. I took a lot of real quick self portraits over the summer, because I didn’t know if someone was gonna find me and walk up and be like “oh there’s a naked person here” so there’s that.
I’m also sharing with everyone a video that I made last year, I think it was this time last year honestly, about reparations. If you’re a BIPOC and that is kindof triggering for you… like reparations itself I think isn’t triggering, it’s an excellent thing that we should definitely be doing. Collectively, individually, and govts and stuff, reparations need to be given out for sure, there’s no question of it in my mind. But I did discuss things that could be triggering, like the reason why we need reparations. So if that kind of thing is triggering for you, definitely use your discretion on what’s best for you and your mental health and what you want to consume or not. It will not hurt my feelings if you don’t want to watch the video. It’s basically me just talking to the camera about reparations and about this article that I read about reparations which is amazing. I’ll link it in the caption below (CLICK HERE TO READ IT) so if you want to read that article, that’s available to you. I think it’s called The Case for Reparations by… I’m probably going to butcher their name but it’s Ta-Nehisi Coates. I’m not sure if I’m saying their name right or not, but hopefully it’s close. But it’s amazing, if you need more information definitely check the article out, I’ll link to it.
Other things that I’m sharing, First Look people are getting the photos that I took of Eva Luna & KH at a nude beach outside of Portland last summer. I shared some of the single exposures that I took last week with First Look, so this week they’re getting the double exposures which are super my favorite of course duh doubles are my favorite always. I’m excited for you to see those, I have BTS for that as well, I think it’s like 15 minutes of BTS, it’s a lot longer than my self portrait BTS video. I’m excited to share all that with you this week. I don’t have a lot to say personally, there’s not really been much going on for me in a little bit. I am finding a better way to schedule my days, or I’m in the process of beginning to find a better way to schedule my days, so that’s an improvement. I’m supposed to probably start my period in the next week or so, so I’m a little more emotional currently, which I’m kinda embracing a little bit, because I have a history of not really feeling my feelings, so I want to lean into feeling my feelings because I deserve to feel them. And so do you, you deserve to feel your feelings too.
This will be a short video today, I just wanted to say hi and I love you and I’m so glad you’re here. I’d love to hear what you think about all these photos I’m sharing with you, or what your thoughts on reparations are. Honestly if your thoughts on reparations are that you don’t want to do it or it’s “unnecessary” then I don’t want to hear your opinion, because I don’t think there’s a way you can convince me that we should not do reparations. I do think that reparations can come in the form of abolishing our government, and abolishing police, and abolishing ICE and taking all the money that’s in all of those things, including our fucking military, hello. All of that money could go into the community and that could be a form of reparations. Also individually taking money out of your pocket and giving it to people of color. All of those things are wonderful. Let’s be gay and do crime.
Okay I love you thank you for being here, I would love to hear what kinds of things you’re personally doing for reparations, or ways you think it could be done through the government. I’m kindof against the government I’m totally an abolitionist, but I think there’s a way to dismantle the systems that are in place and replace them with things that actually work for everyone, but it’s just going to be a process. So this video ended up being longer than I expected, but yes okay. I love you, thank you for being here, and I’ll talk to you next week, bye!
Video members:
click here to view the full self portrait photoset I took in Utah during my cross county road trip last summer
click here to view the BTS video
click here to view the video talking about reparations (content warning: I speak about injustice and violence toward BIPOC)First Look members:
click here to view the photoset double exposure photoset I took of Eva Luna & KH outside of Portland
click here to view the BTS video -
Tiffany Helms in the Ruins
Video members now have access to:
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vlog with the story behind this photoset of Tiffany Helms at an abandoned location on Bainbridge Island during my cross country road trip last summer
- 37 image complete photoset
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4 BTS videos
- 7 BTS photos
First Look members now have access to:
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everything above
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34 image complete photoset of Embodoe wearing WhiskeyDog Wares taken by Kara Perry double exposed over images I took of Wyoming and NC waterfalls
- 8 videos (49.5+ minutes total) from a walk through the woods
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Tiffany Helms in the Ruins
CAPTION FOR VIDEO ABOVE:
Hi friends! So this week the photos that I’m sharing with you are photos that I took with Tiffany Helms, you saw a photoset I think it was 2 weeks ago that I shared with you of her. We took I think it was 3 or 4 different photosets so this is another photoset from that same day. These are the photos that we took in this ruins place that we hiked to that was really cool. I don’t exactly know what it used to be, but it was this cool place on Bainbridge Island. We parked… so we drove like 5-10 mins from her house on Bainbridge Island and parked at a parking lot for a park and walked around and went to this spot and it was awesome! We took a bunch of photos there and I actually also have some photos to share with you on another date, another time, that Tiffany’s partner Jeff Waters took of me and some of them Tiffany is also in. This is when I had really long hair and Tiffany also has long blonde hair so we looked very similar. We also are around the same size and height and stuff so that was pretty cool, I’ll share those with you later. These photos are photos I took of her in this ruins area. I think they’re super awesome and I love them and there’s this huge cool tree and it was just fun exploring this place so I’m excited to share those with you. There’s some BTS video and stuff too.
I think… I think this week the first look stuff that I’m sharing is a photoset that was taken by Kara Perry of Embodoe (on instagram) with a roll of my images from my trip last summer, double exposures, so I took this roll of landscapes and Kara double exposed over it with her friend Embodoe, I think her name is Emily? But her IG name is Embodoe so that’s the name I’m going to be using especially since I’m going to be tagging her in this so you can go to her page and look at all the things. I think these photos are super awesome. Embodoe was wearing lingerie that was handmade here in NC by WhiskeyDog Wares so if you need some handmade underwear things or lingerie, totally check WhiskeyDog Wares out, her stuff is amazing. There’s also a couple other photosets that Kara took with my landscape film, double exposures that she took of other models wearing WhiskeyDog Wares that I’ll be sharing with you in the future also. They’re super awesome. I love Kara, I love WhiskeyDog Wares, I’m really excited that they were using some of my film for that.
What else do I want to share with you? I’ve had a weird couple of days, the full moon on Monday… I don’t know, has me feeling kinda weird. I’ve felt very stuck this week and like I want to just sit around and not do anything. I’m going to sit down. Yeah I’ve felt stuck this week, I’ve felt like I don’t know what direction I want to go in, I don’t know what my goals are. It’s been great to slow down on the live things online so I can recalibrate and figure out where I want my time to go. Yeah I’m still figuring that out. I don’t know where I want my time to go. I’ve been working on a special secret project with Lior and Roarie this week. I don’t want to talk to much about it in case things… you know… but, enough about that. Conscious Creativity was INCREDIBLE and exceeded my expectations. That was last weekend on Saturday. If you joined us I am so thankful that you did, and I would love to hear from you on how it went for you and what your thoughts are on it, what you liked, what you didn’t like, what you’d like to see more of, anything you’d like to change. I had an incredible time, we planned it for 2 hours and it ended up being 3. I was blown away with all of the vulnerable sharing that everyone did and the discussion that we had and the valuable conversation and empathy that we had with each other. The way that we… everyone was so respectful of each other and valued each other as humans and it was so wonderful and I super loved all of the movement things we did together. I think that was a really fun way to connect online even though we’re not in person, still being in our bodies is great and it’s something that I want to continue doing.
I’m not sure what’s coming up for the future still, I probably will never know, but I’m glad that I have the time and space now to really feel into what works for me. At this point I don’t know what that is yet, but I have the time and space to figure that out. I’m thankful for yall for being here with me. If you have anything that you’d like to contribute in terms of ideas or recommendations or comments about how I run this website, about how I show up online. I’m definitely really open to that. I value your input and I value your thoughts and preferences and I definitely want to consider that in the things that I do. I really appreciate all of you for being here with me and for continuing to show up every week and for supporting me and for enjoying the work that I put out. I really don’t know what’s next, I really don’t. I definitely want to do more events, more workshops, more group things. Obviously online is accessible and offline in person is a little out of reach at the moment with the state of the world, but I would really like to in the future open it back up to in person events again, because those are so transformative and incredible and I get so much out of those and I know that the people who participate in in person events really get a lot out of them too. So yeah, if you have anything to share with me about your experience here on my website as a member, your experience as a participant in any of the events I’ve put on, I’d love to hear what you have to say. If you have any ideas that you’d love to see from me, let me know. I do plan on doing more video content, I don’t know exactly what that means yet. I think I’d really like to make some mediation and relaxation kindof videos. I have a lot of nature video content that I could use for relaxing ASMR nature meditation chill video things, which is what I’m kinda thinking about recently. Yeah I’d love to have your feedback. I love you, thank you for being on this journey with me, and I’ll talk to you next week. =]
Video members:
click here to view the full photoset of Tiffany Helms at an abandoned location on Bainbridge Island during my cross country road trip last summer
click here to view the BTS video + photosFirst Look members:
click here to view the photoset of Embodoe wearing WhiskeyDog Wares taken by Kara Perry double exposed over images I took of Wyoming and NC waterfalls
click here to view the videos from a walk through the woods